Posts Tagged ‘festivals’
June 30, 2016



While Britain Brexits, the rest of us brick it. Well, one listener certainly does, as the proud owner of a single brick. Congratulations, that man! We’re glad one listener in Answer Me This! Episode 334 is happy, at least. Others have trouble with:
public sex
haircuts in space
Apple Store geniuses
buttercups
the Pilton Glastonbury Festival
gravity vs hair-washing
wind chimes
ambient noise apps
queening
Eiffel Towering
Jeff Lynne
and
the price of clay.
Plus: Olly attends a Barry Manilow rally; Helen makes clear the relationship between her and podcast listeners; and Martin the Sound Man manages to sully both sexy role play and the Apple Store in one line.
In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iThings, Android and Windows devices), Olly is perplexed by the logistics of ‘queening’, and we wonder about the admin of having a particularly thrilling sex life.
For an easier-to-organise thrill, get the AMT Sports Day album from answermethisstore.com, where you can also purchase our other albums and episodes 1-200. And treat yourself to a free audiobook at answermethispodcast.com/audible, to drown out the sound of Britain sticking its hand into the toaster and screaming with surprise when it hurts.
You can also spot a bit of Glastonbury in the Romance instalment of our Great* British Questions series of videos from a few years ago.
*sob!
Oh, and Martin did a song about a brick.
Got questions? Call the Question Line on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, and email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Be our interfriend at twitter.com/helenandolly and facebook.com/answermethis.
We’ll be back on 14 July with AMT335,
Helen & Olly
••• AMT334 Child-Friendly Rating: 5%. Contains the earliest swear ever in an episode of AMT. Blame Brexit. •••
Tags:ambient noise, Andrew Kerr, Apple, Apple Store, astronauts, Audible, audiobooks, Barry Manilow, bees, Brexit, bricks, Britain, buttercups, Caitlin Moran, clay, concerts, cosmonauts, despair, Eiffel Towering, ELO, Elon Musk, EU Referendum, Europe, feng shui, festivals, Flora, flowers, Genius Bar, gigs, Glastonbury, Glastonbury Festival, hair, haircuts, Jeff Lynne, Joanna Neary, landmarks, Las Vegas, ley lines, London Eye, memoirs, Michael Eavis, Moby, music, music festivals, neighbors, neighbours, noises, performance, Pilton, plants, politics, price, public sex, queening, referendum, Sawbridgeworth, screaming, sex, Shepton Mallet, slang, Somerset, space, space travel, the Berlin Wall, the Queen, Tim Peake, Tom Hanks, United Kingdom, votes, voting, weight, wind chimes, Woodstock, Worthy Farm, zero gravity
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »
September 3, 2015


MISSING PERSON ALERT! If you are the elusive J formerly of Portland – or you know him (identifying features: tattooed; can make coffee; listens to AMT) – please, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 322 to hear a J-aimed plea, as well as:
selfie stick casualties
Morris merch
Desperate Dan
Aussie Man and Van vs A Nice Man With a Van
Disney Parks vs American National Parks
spa breaks
fear of holidays
phone a friend
PopMaster
stag do fun
and
hair transplants.
Plus: if Olly’s head is looking a bit red, that’s just his hair deciding to grow back; Helen will need an activity break to recover from the stress of a spa relaxation break; and Martin the Sound Man recommends a nice relaxing tour of the castles of Wales.
In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iThings, Android and Windows devices – Olly rejects the original Dennis the Menace for a foreign imposter.
Do not make the mistake of rejecting today’s sponsor Squarespace.com. Use the code ANSWER to get 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year, which include a URL, loads of storage and 24/7 support. Nowt wrong with that.
Whatever is wrong with you or the world around you can be enshrined into a question and sent to us: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Befriend us online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.
We’ll return on 17rd September 2015 with AMT323. Try not to be eaten by a bear before then.
Helen & Olly
••• AMT322 Child-Friendly Rating: 67%. Some swears, not much filth. •••
Tags:accidents, Aussie Man and Van, Australians, awkward, bald, baldness, baldness treatment, bears, bells, Bernard, bison, blackface, business names, cartoons, cheating, Chris Tarrant, comics, cow pie, dance, dancing, Dancing on Ice, David Cameron, Desperate Dan, Disney, employment tribunals, fears, festivals, folk, folk etymology, folk festivals, follicles, game shows, Google, hair loss, hair replacement, hair transplants, holidays, Jason Gardiner, Ken Bruce, man with van, minibreaks, missing persons, Moorish, Moors, Morris dancing, national parks, nationalities, Nice, NPS, pageantry, phone a friend, photography, photos, PopMaster, Portland, quiz shows, racism, Radio 2, removal firms, removals, RISK!, selfies, spas, Squarespace, stag dos, step-selfies, surgical procedures, telly, The Beano, The Dandy, tradition, trichology, TV, tv shows, USA, vacations, Wayne Rooney, weird British shit, Who Wants to be a Millionaire?
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »
March 27, 2014
Hello listeners!
Very exciting news: we’ve made a Radio 4 documentary to celebrate the tenth anniversary of the word ‘podcast’. It’s in two installments, out at 11am on Friday 4th and 11th April. It features many podcasting luminaries – including Marc Maron, Roman Mars, Keith and the Girl, Theresa Thorn, Betty in the Sky, the Buglers, the Night Valers, and also our old adversary Richard Herring. If you can’t wait for eight whole days to hear us talk to him, listen to the recent RHLSTP in which we air all that dirty laundry.
Amid all this talk of other things to listen to, don’t forget to apply yourself to Answer Me This! Episode 286:


In which we discuss:
castles
Oktoberfest
chilled red wine
velvet ropes
decorative sticks
babysitting vs kitten-sitting
Mardi Gras vs Pancake Day
Navajo rugs vs dreamcatchers
Glastonbury scheduling
EcuadorPanama hats
London’s cat cafe
mythical bestiality
and
the first ever porn film.
Plus: Olly was all business, no pleasure at his school leavers’ ball; Helen prefers the pong of garlic breath to perfume; and Martin the Sound Man worries about worldly souvenirs making him into a bellend. Don’t worry Martin, you were already a bellend! JK. (Or is it?)
Today’s Bit of Crap on the App contains more perfume-chat, in which Olly sabotages any future he had as a department store perfume salesperson. Pinch your nose and spray the app into your ears from your iDevices, Android or Windows gadgets.
Here’s something that doesn’t stink: today’s episode-funders Squarespace.com offering you a 10% discount off their services for a whole year if you use the code answer3. What a breath of fresh air!
And finally, we ask that you take a deep breath and send us your QUESTIONS: call the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
Back in a fortnight!
Helen & Olly
AMT286 Child-Friendly Rating: 42%. First three quarters are clean, apart from a couple of questioneer-led swears. The episode ends on a question about porn films, but by then your children will probably have fallen asleep during the earlier question about road signs.
Tags:adventure playground, bad breath, bad business, basil, beer, BFI, breath, business cards, castles, cat-sitting, cats, Charing Cross, cilantro, Coco, coriander, Coventry, Denholm Elliott, Denmark, dill, Dragon's Den, dreamcatchers, Ecuador, festivals, fez, film, garlic, garlic breath, geography, Germanic things, Germany, grandmothers, halitosis, Halloween, hats, headgear, Helen GA, herbs, Indiana Jones, jobs, kittens, Leavers' Balls, London, Marc Maron, Mardi Gras, mint, movies, Native Americans, Navajo rugs, Nelson's Column, Netherlands, Oktoberfest, Olly's cat, Panama, Panama hats, Pancake Day, parsley, payment, perfume, Playboy Mansion, podcasting, prawn, RHLSTP, Richard Herring, road signs, Roman Mars, SatNav, satyrs, scent, selfies, Shrove Tuesday, signs, souvenirs, Squarespace, stinky, Sweden, Swedish pron, tact, teenagers, temperature, Theresa Thorn, thyme, travel, Trunki, Twitter, velvet ropes, web design, wine, work
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »
June 19, 2013

Pack your flippers, sunblock and emergency stomach medicine, because our new album The Answer Me This! Holiday is ready to depart!



It’s 58 minutes 3 seconds of all-new material – right down to the jingles – all about holidays, vacations, minibreaks, staycations, jaunts, sojourns, escapes; whatever you like to call them. In the usual AMT style, we tackle questions about such holidayish topics as:
things to do in New York City
summer reading lists
artificial insemination for pandas
dads’ embarrassing holiday-wear
what lies behind – or, more accurately, beneath – the scenes at Disney
Legoland sculptors
why the Spanish Steps in Rome aren’t Spanish
what to expect from a Chinese breakfast
stag parties abroad
and
why the Brits are lagging behind in competitive eating contests.
Also thrown in with your all-inclusive AMT Holiday package:
• A full range of holidaywear: clip-on sunglasses, short shorts, convertible trousers, Speedos, gilets, electroejaculators;
• Classic tourist attractions: the Staten Island Ferry, Downton Abbey, Disney’s utilidors, Burghley House, the Winchester Mystery House, Flambards and A Day at the Wells;
• Delicious holiday grub: satirical breakfasts, ‘world famous’ foods, congee, Sex on the Beach, the Heart Attack Grill, pork and its tasty friends, Economy Candy;
• Delightful holiday companions: Cara Delevingne, Eugene Levy, Nancy Mitford, Adam Richman, naked mole rats, Spagna;
• Fun holiday activities: the ‘bollocks’ game at festivals, drinking games, humiliating your fellow diners, being assaulted by Mexican shots girls, trying to remember your one-night-stand’s name.
The Answer Me This! Holiday is available right now for only £2.49 from iTUNES, AMAZON, or directly from us at the Answer Me This! Store
Want to try before you fly? Here’s a sample:
Big thanks to Amy Smith and Sam Pay for the jingles and Jenny Robertshaw for the cover – and speculatively to you for buying it, because your outlay helps fund Answer Me This! (and our actual holidays).
Tags:abbeys, abroad, Adam Richman, air travel, alcohol, America, Americans, artificial insemination, Audrey Hepburn, australia, Austria, Babe: Pig in the City, bachelor parties, backpacking, bars, bartenders, bartending, beaches, behind the scenes, bollocks, books, booze, bratwurst, breakfast, breaks, brief encounters, Brits abroad, burgers, Burghley House, cafes, California, Cancun, candy, Cara Delevingne, Chico, China, Chinese food, city breaks, climate, clip-on sunglasses, clothes, clothing, cocktails, competitive eating, confectionery, congee, cool, Cornwall, country houses, customs, dads, deep-fried devils, dim sum, Disney, Disney parks, Donald Trump, Downton Abbey, drink, drinking, drinking games, drinks, eating, eating contests, Edinburgh zoo, Egypt, ejaculate, ejaculation, electroejaculation, Elf, embarrassment, endangered species, etiquette, Eugene Levy, Europe, eyewear, Facebook, fashion, fathers, festivals, fezes, films, Flambards, flights, flying, food, foreign travel, frat boys, Friends, full English breakfast, fun, gilets, Great Britain, habits, hats, Heart Attack Grill, hedonism, Highclere Castle, holidaymakers, holidays, Home Alone 2, hot dogs, humiliation, identity, islands, Italy, Japan, Japanese food, jaunts, jetlag, Judi Dench, King Kong, Las Vegas, Lego, Legoland, legs, leisure, living museums, locals, mac'n'cheese, Man V Food, Manhattan, manners, meals, meat, Merlin, Mexico, mochi, movies, museums, music festivals, naked mole rats, Nancy Mitford, New York, New York City, noodles, one night stands, Only Fools and Horses, overseas, package holidays, panda sperm, pandas, parents, period costume, Peter Sutcliffe, Piazza dei Spagna, Propofol, public displays of eating, public humiliation, publishing, pubs, reading, resorts, restaurants, rice, road trips, Roman Holiday, Rome, seasons, serendipity, sex, shame, short shorts, shorts, shot girls, shots, Spagna, Spain, Spanish Steps, Speedos, sperm-gathering, spring break, stag parties, stags, stately homes, Staten Island ferry, staying at home, summer, sun, sunglasses, sunshine, sweets, tallow, Tenerife, terms of endearment, Texas, The Hangover, theme parks, thighs, Times Square, Tom Daley, tourism, tourist attractions, tourists, tours, transatlantic, travel, traveling, trips, trousers, Tunbridge Wells, turkey, UK, USA, Utah, utilidors, vacation, Victorian England, Victorians, Vienna, visiting, visitors, visits, walking, Walt Disney, weather, Yorkshire Ripper, yoyos, zoos
Posted in albums, extracurricular activities, frippery | 12 Comments »
August 25, 2011
It’s pretty unusual for us podcasters to venture out of our comfortable armchairs, let alone venture into the great not-indoors. Last weekend, however, we donned our cagoules, stocked up on wet-wipes, and took in a lungful of folk-laced fresh air at the Green Man festival – where we had such a smashing time, we decided to record Answer Me This! Episode 189 right there:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In a field in Wales, we talk about:
camping with Charlotte Church
Batman: Arkham City
zebra-riding
cornichons
talking trains
the sexy Green M&M
the 9 1/2 Weeks
fridge
the Cadbury’s Caramel Bunny vs. Jessica Rabbit
Cadbury World vs. Kraft World
George W. Ferris
Mrs Fat Controller
and
local anaesthetic.
Plus: Olly fears the revenge of Kris Marshall; Helen discovers a sport she IS interested in: topless frisbee; and Martin the Sound Man sees a future where Batman and Catwoman give birth to Dustin Hoffman.
As you’ll hear, we were joined this week by some unexpected guests in the shape of wasps. (They weren’t just shaped like wasps; they were wasps.) Next week, we should be joined by a much less stingy and stripy special guest in the shape of Jon Ronson. (He’s not just shaped like Jon Ronson, he is Jon Ronson.) So concoct some QUESTIONS for the fan of psychopaths, goat-starers and Robbie Williams, and send them in the form of voicemails to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or Skype answermethis) or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
We do hope that Jon remembers to turn up, but whether he does or not, we’ll deffers see you next Thursday,
Helen & Olly
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Tags:9 1/2 Weeks, advertising, adverts, anaesthesia, ants, babies, Batman, body hair, bridesmaid, Bruce Wayne, BT couple, Cadbury's, camping, caramel, cartoons, Catwoman, celebrities, Charlotte Church, cheating, children's telly, chocolate, comic books, confectionery, depilation, donkey, engagement, Essex, exams, Fat Controller, fattitude, ferris wheels, festivals, food, fridge, fruit, gherkins, Gotham City, Green Man, Greenwich, hernia, horse, hospital, hygiene, Ian Collins, Jessica Rabbit, Jon Ronson, Kim Basinger, kitchen sex, Kraft, Kris Marshall, love spoons, marriage, Mickey Rourke, Midnight Cowboy, movies, music, nurses, offspring, olives, operations, patients, peaches, pears, pickles, plums, pub quizzes, pubs, quizzes, rabbits, rides, riding, ripeness, sex, sex with celebrities, sexy cartoons, sexy food, soft fruit, superheroes, surgery, sweets, tents, The Only Way Is Essex, Thomas the Tank Engine, TOWIE, vajazzle, Wales, wasps, waxing, weddings, zebra
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »
October 14, 2010
Hello!
Of course, you’re already used to getting good advice from us. (Shut up!) But this week, we have some even better advice from broadcasting stalwart Paul Ross, which was instrumental in making Olly Mann the broadcasting stalwart he himself is today. Hear what it was here and here only, in Answer Me This! Episode 152:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
This week, we address subjects including:
90s collars
Benson & Hedges
The Saturdays
butterbear
Carr’s water biscuits
yuppie kids
evil spirits
Ciro Citterio
the Queen vs. Pixie Lott
Batman’s wedding
Hong Kong tailors
trangias
Terry’s Chocolate Lemons
ligatures
Warhorse
Ben Stiller’s workwear
the musical cleft
Luciano Pavarotti outstaying his welcome
ball-handlers
the Isle of Arran
and
&.
Furthermore: Olly is a staunch conservative when it comes to the appropriate composition of orange-flavoured foodstuffs; Helen’s innate scruffiness has dashed her telemarketing dreams; and Martin the Sound Man stands up for Tom Stoppard. Meanwhile, over on the app, Gaz from Jedburgh has a question about a problem we’re sure is common to a great many of you: nepotism in the forestry business.
Everyone who got a question answered in today’s episode needs to email us their postal address sharpish, so we can send along a free copy of the Answer Me This! book; everyone else needs to send us a QUESTION to be in with a chance to win a free book, along with an answer, of course. You know what to do: leave a voicemail on the Question Line 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
See you next week!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:1990s, actors, advertising, ampersand, Arcadia, balls, Bentleys, beverages, Big Ben, Black Eyed Peas, book, brides, camping, cars, children, chocolate, chocolate oranges, cigarettes, Cilla Black, citrus, clocks, clothes, confectionery, curtain calls, customs, dapperness, delicacies, Disney, drinks, Duchy Originals, encores, fashion, festivals, Florida, fonts, food, fruit, funerals, Gamu, gigs, gloves, Guns N'Roses, hands, Harry Hill, Harry Potter, holidays, Hong Kong, horses, Houses of Parliament, kids, linguistics, Little Britain, Lotto, malapropisms, marketing, Marmite, marriage, Melanie Blatt, Mickey Mouse, monarchy, music, music festivals, National Lottery, nepotism, Oedipus, oranges, Pixie Lott, Prince Charles, prison, prom, punctuation, Queen, Ralph Lauren, royal family, royalty, sartoria, school, Scotland, sexism, showmanship, Slash, smoking, style, suit, superstition, telly, the Queen, theatre, theatricality, theme parks, Tommy Hilfiger, tradition, type, typeface, veils, weddings, X Factor, yuk
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »
May 13, 2010
Hello little chums,
It’s all very unsettling, this regime change and Conservacrat coalitions and so on; so let’s stick with things that are comforting and familiar. Corduroy, say, or those sweetie prawns you only get as part of pick’n’mix, or the face of Richard Madeley. All that and more things which aren’t the sour tang of political discomfort in Answer Me This! Episode 135:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Within we speak of:
the Dyson fan
gummy bears
onion cocaine
irresponsible science teachers
concentrated pigments
Mike Patton’s travel wash
Common’s dry hands
Daphne and Celeste
survival vs. the Red Hot Chili Peppers
FishMac
Heinz
the Whigs
Gideon Sundback
the mischief of tailors
Katie Melua
and
Hot Pittites.
Plus: Olly hates jelly babies despite their brilliant capacity for mischief; Helen finds an unlikely way for widowers to assuage their grief; and Martin the Sound Man violates Olly at the Sony Awards. Cheeky chappie. You can see and hear him being much better behaved on this educational video and the Bright Club podcast.
Since this is an interactive podcast, please interact with us by asking your QUESTIONS: do that with your voices, by leaving a message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis; or do that with your words by emailing them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
See you next Thursday!
Helen and Olly
Subscribe with iTunes • Listen to episodes • Question Archive • FAQ
• App • Facebook • Twitter • Merch Superstore • YouTube Channel •
Tags:Apple, bad manners, celebrities, childhood, condiments, confectionery, Conservatives, corduroy, election, fans, fashion, festivals, First World War, fish, five a day, food, green, history, hygiene, inventions, James Dyson, jelly babies, Jenni Murray, Katie Melua, lessons, Mac, McDonald's, myths, piss, Radio 4, Richard Madely, rock, royalty, salad cream, school, Sony Awards, Steve Jobs, stupid, stupid campaigns, suits, Tories, vegetarianism, war, William Pitt the Younger, Woman's Hour, yuk, zips
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »
September 10, 2009
Good morning, fellows,
Answer Me This! Episode 108 is one for the record-books! Why? Is it the world’s fastest-ever podcast? No. Is it the world’s fattest-ever podcast? Possibly… Oh, shut up. Actually, the superlative achievement we refer to is this: in today’s episode, we read out our longest-ever question. Yes! You excited? Tarry no longer:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
As well as the behemoth question, we talk about:
Lady Sovereign
the Romans
cuttlefish
head ushers
pierced kidneys
Coinstar machines
sex in tents
Sinitta
Brian Wilson
Mr Bean
and
groats.
Furthermore, Olly displays a surprisingly delicate sensibility towards the bare-chested ladies of Page 3; Helen blames a broken mirror for her sub-par exam results, rather than the fact that she was too lazy to do any revision; and Martin the Sound Man will soon be auditioning for a new Best Man – mint-condition applicants ONLY, please; he’s not taking anyone else’s cast-offs.
This episode also comes with illustrations! Like Storyteller magazine – ‘ting!’ when you turn the page, etc etc – only in this case, your cue is when you hear us talking about grisly piercings, at which point you may want to view these pictures (SFW, don’t worry).
If you have any unusual body-art you feel compelled to share with us – or, preferably, you have some QUESTIONS for us, please get in touch: email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, or croon them into the ear of Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877. Plus if you’re a cheapskate with a bit of advice for William from Larne’s student budget, please leave it in a comment below (don’t worry, it’s totally free).
See you next week!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:adornments, air travel, camping, dilemmas, etymology, festivals, friendship, hygiene, manners, money, penises, pets, piercings, public indecency, romance, sex, sleeping, Stanmore, superstition, swimming, weddings
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »
July 30, 2009
Well, what a splendid week it has been, what with this and that, and now the cherry on the cake, the ketchup on the potato waffle, the skin on the cocoa: Answer Me This! Episode 102!

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
This week we discuss such grave matters as:
the perils of pylons
The Mousetrap
Piz Buin vs. L’Oreal
happy-slapping
Dennis Hopper snorting tractor-fuel
The Crying Game
cucumbers
sunbathing in World War II
minicabs
and
Heathrow Terminal 5.
Plus: Olly yet again proves himself way ahead of the curve, having managed to produce a viral song in 1991; Helen stands up for her religious boundary-crossing relationship; Martin the Sound Man has nobody to play with in the swimming pool; and, unknowingly, Inspector Morse comes to our rescue in a matter of correct spelling. Such a gent.
Despite our recent chart-nontopping success, we’re still staying close to our roots and imploring you to send us your QUESTIONS for future episodes. You can submit them in the form of an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or a voice message to Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877; we’re not fussy.
See you next week,
Helen and Olly
PS. Anyone who doesn’t believe in the festival of the summer, the Peasenhall Pea Festival: below is photographic evidence!
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Martin the Sound Man gets ready to rock the Peasenhall Pea Festival
-
-
There are more brilliant puns where this came from, would you believe
-
-
Look, it hadn’t started yet, alright?
-
-
Indeed.
Add this episode to: 

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Tags:crime, festivals, linguistics, movies, neighbours, peas, school, spelling, spoilers
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »