Posts Tagged ‘goats’

EPISODE 379: it’s just tiny jam

November 7, 2019

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After last month’s consideration of the ‘As I Was Going To St Ives’ maths riddle, we receive clarification from the actual Mayor of St Ives! Well, the mayor of a St Ives, Olly still disputes that it’s the St Ives. Also in Answer Me This! Episode 379, we deal with topics including:

fly killing
spider killing redemption
dogs vs children
Cornwall vs Cambridgeshire
the ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ video vs Shakespeare
the ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ video vs Hungry Hungry Hippos
the Chapel of St Leger
garlic breath
tiny stolen jams
empathy for wasps
and
the Billboard Video Music Award for the Most Effective Use of Symbolism.

In this month’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – Olly pinpoints the one thing he likes about travelling alone.

Also! ‘Tis the season (or, close enough) to fire up the AMT Christmas special album, which is one hour of festive fun only available from answermethisstore.com/Apple/Amazon. While you’re there, treat yourself to some of our classic episodes, why don’t you?

For more ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ content, listen to Helen’s Allusionist episode Eclipse, which includes some beautiful TEOTH-inspired music by Martin. (Content warning: medical stuff.) The Allusionist is also on tour in North America RIGHT NOW, gig listings are at theallusionist.org/events.

For your media education, listen to Olly host The Media Podcast, as well has his squillion other podcasts.

Martin is releasing four albums of new music this year! Hear them at palebirdmusic.com, on the Pale Bird podcast, and on Spotify etc.

This episode is sponsored by Squarespace. Visit squarespace.com/answer and get 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain with the discount code ‘answer‘.

As ever, we want your QUESTIONS: send them, in writing or as voice recordings, to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. If you’ve got questions about Christmas, send them to us NOW and not on Boxing Day.

Be our interfriend at twitter.com/HelenAndOlly and facebook.com/answermethis.

We’ll be back with AMT380 on 5 December 2019, and there’ll be a Retro AMT episode in your feeds on 20 November.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT379 Child-Friendly Rating: 78%. Pretty clean – couple of slight swears – but the dynamics of whatever’s happening in the ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ video may give you pause. •••

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L-O-V-E

January 25, 2016

AMT LOVE

Gird your loins, unbutton your emotions, because the Answer Me This! Love album is OUT NOW and begging for your affections.

Buy it from iTunes, Amazon or our own Answer Me This! Store for only £2.99.

The album features a whole hour of love, sex, dating and genitals, and it’s all completely new AMT material that has never appeared on the podcast. Such as:

Is it appropriate to buy sexy clothes for your mum?
How do you make putting on a condom fun?
Just what is in that liquid squirting out of your girlfriend?
When you’ve lost your engagement ring, how best to style it out?
Is your partner’s schoolgirl fetish something you should worry about? It’s not like he’s a teacher – oh, he is? Oh.
How do you set up a blind date when you’re a blind dater?
How can anyone feel horny at the prospect of a vagina bristling with sharp, spiky horns?
What’s the best point of a wedding ceremony to call it off?
How do they come up with all those lines on Take Me Out?
What is your exhibitionist housemate really trying to show you?
How many holes should there be in a penis?

Here’s a little preview:

Any further questions?

Is this album suitable for me if I’m not at all in the mood for love, sex, or interacting with humanity at all?
YES. If all these people were having such a great time, they wouldn’t be writing to us, would they?

Is this album child-friendly?
HELL NO.

Will this album teach me what it’s like to have the Olly Mann Valentine’s Experience?
YES.

Will Helen say the word ‘urethra’ so many times, I will feel a bit sick?
MAYBE.

You can get it from iTunes and Amazon, but if you want all of your money to go to us and none to Megacorp, buy it directly from the AMT Store.

AMTStorebuy it now buttonbuy it now button

Hear the other AMT albums at answermethispodcast.com/albums

 

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EPISODE 315: jazz dab

May 28, 2015

Are you ready to get your stonk on? (Whatever that actually means.) Then listen to Answer Me This! Episode 315:

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Today we deal with:

caffeine overdoses
the Lotto Drawmaster’s gloves
iPad infidelity alerts
soundchecks
Periscope
Hale and Pace
goatees
Van Dykes
imperials
and
nemeses.

Plus: Olly lies about his breakfast and reveals a surprising new phobia; Helen ruins some of your favourite songs; and Martin the Sound Man luckily has grown out of his Nu Metal phase.

Today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iThings, Android and Windows devices) is a question from Steffy in Bristol: ‘What is Swarovski crystal?’

For more additional listening, this is the podcast we mentioned about the consequences of soundchecking by asking interviewees ‘What did you have for breakfast?’ Makeuthink.

Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. After you’ve shaved off your soul patch, befriend us at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll return on 11th June 2015 with AMT316, can you keep your stonk going until then?

Helen & Olly

••• AMT315 Child-Friendly Rating: 40%. Quite a few swears. Question about infidelity; not sexually graphic, but may compel your child to ask Awkward Questions. A lot of boner chat in the question about ‘stonk’, but not so much lewd as sobering in light of recent BBC revelations. •••

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EPISODE 309: Have It Your Way

March 5, 2015

We’re a crossword clue and a powerful influence upon Burger King’s business plans; what might Answer Me This! Episode 309 wreak?

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On today’s agenda:

existential cats vs existential dogs
Garfield vs Falstaff
Gotham vs Gotham
cookies vs soup
Woodstock
Shazam at funerals
Audrey Hepburn’s pet fawn
Tippi Hedren’s pet lion
Mike Tyson’s pet tiger
Mike Tyson’s pet pigeons
Nicolas Cage’s pet octopus
baked bean baths
Cuckoo Bush Mound
stage weapons
sexy spaghetti
and
Olly’s ABSOLUTELY UNCANNY impression of Ben Affleck as Batman.

Plus: here’s our previous work on the origins of Gotham City; here’s some advice for you if you’re planning a sexy spagetti bath; let us know what your most uncomfortable and gross charity endeavour was; and would you whip out your phone to Shazam this song during a funeral?

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (get it for iDevices, Android and Windows gadgets) there’s a little more about the history of Gotham. We think we’ve triangulated where Catwoman is pursuing her postgrad education.

Send us questions, please! Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. You can also keep us company online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll be back on 19th March 2015 with AMT310, hopefully you will be too.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT309 Child-Friendly Rating: 70%. The language is coarse, but the content isn’t particularly. •••

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Gotham

February 27, 2013

batman_3_gotham_city-wide

CLICK HERE FOR AMT247

Here’s a question of bats and goats from Ian:

I am from a small village outside Nottingham called Gotham. My friend says Gotham City is named after this tiny village, as the writer of
Batman was obsessed by the mad men of Gotham legend, which the village is locally famous for. So answer me this, is he telling the truth?

He is telling both truth and untruth. Bill Finger, whose fingers co-created Batman, wanted to change Batman’s stamping ground from New York City to a similar but fictional location. After considering names including Civic City (tautological!) Capital City (F- for effort, Finger!) and Coast City (bor-inggggggg!!!!) he flipped through the NYC phonebook – presumably looking for listings for an ‘Emergency Pseudonym Writer’ – and chanced upon Gotham Jewelers. This pleased him and thus Bill Finger pinched the name and put it into the fourth issue of Batman, back in 1940, without so much as a yowl from the mad men of Gotham, Nottinghamshire.

However! The mad men of Gotham can give themselves big pats on their big mad backs because without them, Gotham Jewelers would have been called something else, and Batman would have found himself decking the villains of Cash 4 Gold City. Next time you’re waiting to see the dentist, flip through that copy of Salmagundi Magazine that’s been in the waiting room since 11th November 1807. Therein you’ll see Washington Irving referring to New York City as Gotham, wrily suggesting that the city shared some of the traits of the mythical idiots of Gotham. The 19th century crowd went wild for this joke, but give them a break – they had cholera epidemics to deal with at the time, and almost anything is funnier than a cholera epidemic.

So to answer your question, Ian: the writers of Batman were not obsessed with Nottinghamshire villages, but some local businesses were obsessed with a trend started by an author who might have been obsessed with Nottinghamshire villages, but at the very least was mildly interested in one of them. Just imagine if Washington Irving had been a fan of another Nottinghamshire village; perhaps Bunny, or Papplewick, or even Cropwell Bishop – oh, how much more gentle the Batman realm would have seemed! Not that Gotham itself is that cool either, since it derives from the Old English words ‘goat home’. Wouldn’t it have been great if The Dark Knight Rises, instead of featuring the machinations of corporate bore Miranda Tate, had centred around a malevolent goat looking to seize back its rightful leaseholds? Christopher Nolan, call me!

Since we all know from Trapped in the Closet how creative R Kelly is, it’s particularly galling that he didn’t make more of the goat association. What a missed opportunity.

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EPISODE 178 – big comely nuts

June 9, 2011

Good day to you, dear listeners,

In Answer Me This! Episode 178, we finally discover the point of marriage. It’s not for the love, or for religion, or for the kids. It’s not even for the presents or the party. So what the flap is it for?

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Therein we mention:

the universal train ticket
Eliphas Levi
Buzz Aldrin’s pants
Helen’s slutty mum
the goat of lust
the shittest ride at Thorpe Park
pentagrams
Tetley Tea
McPizzas
Helen and Martin’s divorce settlement
and
the price of nuts.

Plus: Olly wouldn’t want to be the centre of attention on The Happiest Day of His Life (because that would make it too similar to all the other days of his life); Helen operates an equal opportunities policy for animals – she’s happy to cook and eat the ugly ones AND the pretty ones; and Martin the Sound Man tells you how to trap an evil spirit. All you need is a pair of compasses, a ruler and some chalk.

In this week’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available on iPhone or Android), a question from horticulturist Stephen makes us go all Gardener’s Question Time. It must be the smell of manure on the rosebeds that makes Olly hallucinate about a time when we’re wealthy and successful, because if you want your own country pile with 100 acres, don’t ever go into podcasting. EVER.

We do love to hear from you, so please get on the phone (0208 123 5877), the Skype (look for answermethis) or the email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com and ask us your QUESTIONS. If AMT were a sausage, your questions would be the minced pigbits, we would be the rusk and additives. And I think we’ve all just learnt why analogies involving sausages are not a good idea.

Love,

Helen & Olly

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