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EPISODE 351: scary worm

June 1, 2017

Hello, listeners! Answer us this: how would you define ‘Afternoon Delight’?

1. Settling down to watch Countdown with a nice cup of tea (not Lipton) and a nice biscuit (not one that gives you a 20-year-long health fear)?
2. Bit of post-lunch pre-dinner nookie?
3. Listening to Answer Me This! Episode 351, admittedly a delight at any hour of the day?

Today we speak of:

smelly books
the Twitter ~~blue~~ verified tick
Olly Mann vs his more successful and accomplished friend Tom Price
the Intervision Song Contest
artificial Oval Offices
articifical Houses of Commons
medieval dragons
stoned dads
Lipton tea
‘Afternoon Delight‘ in Anchorman, Glee, Good Will Hunting…
and
The Beatles in The Jungle Book?

Plus: Olly has a great tip for maximising your chances of competing in Eurovision; Helen recounts her life’s proudest achievement, no thanks to Lipton; and Martin the Sound Man is a WINNER. Whether you enjoy the works of Tom Waits or not, listen to Martin’s award-winning podcast Song By Song at songbysongpodcast.com.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – Helen gets thrown out of a nightspot for not having the right ID. That’s 37-year-old teetotaller Helen.

Want to hear more from us? There’s the retro AMT episode we throw into your feed mid-month; to get it, subscribe to AMT on your podcatcher of choice. All of our back catalogue is available from answermethisstore.com, along with our special albums including the AMT Sports Day.

Listen to our other work, too, eg Olly’s The Week Unwrapped and The Modern Mann, Helen’s Allusionist, and Martin’s AWARD-WINNING Song By Song.

Thanks to our sponsor Squarespace.com. After putting off building herself a website, AT LAST listener Anna swept aside her inner resistance/fear/laziness, went ahead and created karakalou.com to showcase her artwork (here’s her portrait of The Zaltzwoman). She got 10% off Squarespace’s website-hosting and -designing services for a whole year with the discount code ‘answer‘. Be smart like Anna! Do it! Now! Or in a few minutes! But do it then! What are you waiting for – a free lollipop? Maybe Squarespace will give you one if you stop procrastinating.

Send us your QUESTIONS: call the Question Line on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, and email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Be our interfriend at twitter.com/HelenAndOlly and facebook.com/answermethis.

We’ll be back with AMT352 on 6 July 2017, and with a Retro AMT on 22 June.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT351 Child-Friendly Rating: 48%. Some swears, sex and drug references; endorsement of non-essential teabag theft, which may send your offspring down the wrong path. •••

• STORE • ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:1970s, Aaron Sorkin, Afternoon Delight, Alan Carr, Anchorman, animation, asteroid hunter, BBC, beasts, Belarus, books, cartoons, celebrities, Chatty Man, cookies, creatures, Crystal Palace, David Walliams, deceit, deception, Designated Survivor, Dick Van Dyke, dilemmas, Disney, dope, dragons, drugs, edibles, entertainment, ESC, euphemisms, eurovision song contest, families, family, filming, films, Glee, Good Will Hunting, Gordon Ramsay, House of Commons, Hrishikesh Hirway, Intervision, Jessica Garlick, Jon Ronson, lies, Lipton, marijuana, Mary Poppins, Millennium Dome, movies, Mowgli, music, mythical creatures, North Greenwich, O2 Arena, old books, Oval Office, parents, Parliament, Poland, pop songs, POTUS, president of the USA, Queen Victoria, Roman Mars, Rudyard Kipling, sets, sex, smells, smelly books, smoking, social media, songs, Soviet bloc, Starland Vocal Band, stoned, tea, teabags, TED, telly, The American President, the Beatles, The Jungle Book, The West Wing, tick, Tom Price, TV, Twitter, USSR, verified, Victoria, Vladimir Putin, vultures, Warner Bros, White House, World Idol, year's supply, Yorkshire Tea
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »

EPISODE 324: Wheel of Fortune for eggs

October 1, 2015

Today’s questioneers have family troubles: troubles with their parents’ TMI; troubles with being an egg-peeling mother; troubles with having spawned a kid who’s a bit of an arsehole. Oh, the truth hurts.

You know what else hurts? Being a chicken at an 18th century fairground. Find out why in Answer Me This! Episode 324, in which we also discuss:

Disney jail
clock memes
peanuts vs monkey nuts
coconut shy vs cock shy
lard Oreos
omelette stations
oversharing parents
Yankee Doodle vs Pretty Fly For A White Guy
historical hipsters
The Eggstractor (approach with caution)
boners
and
BONGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!

Plus: Olly delivers TMI about both breakfast buffets and boners (separately, not together, although we wouldn’t put it past him); even after 30 years, Helen is still in the grip of the Brownies’ indoctrination; and Martin the Sound Man has a new podcast, and the whole first series is OUT NOW at songbysongpodcast.com, so go and listen to it (after you’ve finished AMT324 first, of course).

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iThings, Android and Windows devices – we wonder where all the diabolical pop covers of Yankee Doodle are. And before you say, “Careful what you wish for,” NB we are NOT wishing for this. Stand down, Pitbull. Zip it, Rednex.

However, there is no need to exercise such restraint when it comes to trying out today’s sponsor Squarespace.com. Use the code ANSWER to get 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year, which include a URL, loads of storage and 24/7 support. Go on, stop talking about it and start making the website of your dreams.

Don’t let Olly’s boner-talk put you off ~~your breakfast~~ ~~sex~~ ~~ever feeling happiness again~~ sending us your questions: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Befriend us online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll return on 15th October 2015 with AMT325. BONGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

Helen & Olly

••• AMT324 Child-Friendly Rating: 70%. We weren’t being especially vigilant about swears, but nor were we being particularly sweary. There is talk of boners, but in an educational more than XXX manner. •••

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:anatomy, animal cruelty, awkward, bar snacks, biscuits, boners, breakfast buffets, Brownies, chickens, child control, children, chimes, church bells, clocks, cocks, cocoa, coconut shy, coconuts, cookery, cookies, cooking, crime, cruelty to birds, dairy, dandies, difficult, dinner, dinner parties, Disney, Disney jail, Disney World, eggs, erections, etymology, fairground attractions, fairgrounds, family, Five Guys, Florida, folk songs, food, food colouring, Friends, games, genitalia, genitals, Green Day, hardboiled eggs, hipsters, history, hotels, infants, jail, Joseph Jowett, kosher, lard, macaroni, male anatomy, marital disharmony, marital problems, monkey nuts, monkeys, music, Nokia, nuts, omelets, omelette stations, omelettes, Oreos, Orlando, parenting, parents, peanuts, peeling eggs, poultry, Pretty Fly For A White Guy, rip offs, sex, Shania Twain, slang, snacks, social gatherings, songs, Splat The Rat, Squarespace, The Eggstractor, The Offspring, throwing, TMI, toddlers, tunes, urine, wangs, William Crotch, words, Yankee Doodle, your child is an arsehole
Posted in PODCASTS | Leave a Comment »

EPISODE 309: Have It Your Way

March 5, 2015

We’re a crossword clue and a powerful influence upon Burger King’s business plans; what might Answer Me This! Episode 309 wreak?

On today’s agenda:

existential cats vs existential dogs
Garfield vs Falstaff
Gotham vs Gotham
cookies vs soup
Woodstock
Shazam at funerals
Audrey Hepburn’s pet fawn
Tippi Hedren’s pet lion
Mike Tyson’s pet tiger
Mike Tyson’s pet pigeons
Nicolas Cage’s pet octopus
baked bean baths
Cuckoo Bush Mound
stage weapons
sexy spaghetti
and
Olly’s ABSOLUTELY UNCANNY impression of Ben Affleck as Batman.

Plus: here’s our previous work on the origins of Gotham City; here’s some advice for you if you’re planning a sexy spagetti bath; let us know what your most uncomfortable and gross charity endeavour was; and would you whip out your phone to Shazam this song during a funeral?

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (get it for iDevices, Android and Windows gadgets) there’s a little more about the history of Gotham. We think we’ve triangulated where Catwoman is pursuing her postgrad education.

Send us questions, please! Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. You can also keep us company online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll be back on 19th March 2015 with AMT310, hopefully you will be too.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT309 Child-Friendly Rating: 70%. The language is coarse, but the content isn’t particularly. •••

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:actors, animal rescue, animal sanctuaries, Ann Widdecombe, Annette Bening, Arkham City, Audrey Hepburn, bad ideas, baked bean baths, baked beans, baths, Batman, beans, beasts, Ben Affleck, big cats, birds, Bruce Wayne, Burger King, cartoon animals, cartoons, charity, Charles M Schultz, children, Christian Bale, clues, comic books, Comic Relief, comic strips, comics, computer programming, cookies, crosswords, Cuckoo Bush Mound, death, deer, dogs, donkeys, Doomsday Book, ELO, Elvis Presley, fast food, fast food delivery, fawns, fighting, food, food delivery, fun, fundraising, funerals, Garfield, goats, Gotham, Gotham City, gunge tank, Hollywood, Hollywood pets, internet, Jan de Bont, Jonathan Jeremiah, Justin Bieber, kids, lions, Loughborough, Mail on Sunday, Mel Ferrer, Melanie Griffith, Mike Tyson, mobile phones, Mr Blue Sky, music, Netscape, Nicolas Cage, Nottinghamshire, octopus, opera, peanuts, pets, pigeons, place names, props, Red Nose Day, rubber swords, sex tips, Shazam, smartphones, SMS, Snoopy, social networking, social networks, songs, soup, spaghetti, stage fighting, swords, tech, tech terms, text messages, The Andy Williams Show, The Hangover, theatrical, tigers, Tippi Hedren, Twitter, Washington Irving, weapons, web, wild animals, Woodstock, Xerox
Posted in PODCASTS | 3 Comments »

cookie communication

July 16, 2013

••• CLICK HERE FOR AMT262 •••

Remember all that lovely fun we had earlier this year with all your subversion of Thorntons’ icing policy? So does Archie:

I have just been trawling through your old podcasts and found the one where you were talking about whether Thorntons would put anything on a cake.

Two of my friends at school used to get a giant cookie from Millie’s Cookies every week and they got steadily stranger. Goes to show they’re happy to put most things on there!

Click the thumbnails to view the series of cookie abuse: