October 10, 2019
As you were going to St Ives, did you meet a man with seven wives + 7x7x7 cats coming FROM St Ives or did you catch up with them as they were also heading TO St Ives? Ugh! Fucking riddles! We face this beast in Answer Me This! Episode 378 plus problems with:
Blue Peter pet SCANDALS
attraction/lack thereof
the Hairy Bikers’ friendship
‘Solomon Grundy’ vs ‘Seven Days‘
home CCTV
kombucha
and
getting over a lipstick fetishist.
In this month’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – we learn a bit more about naming Baby Lion Toby.
Also!
1. Helen has started a NEW PODCAST! Listen to Veronica Mars Investigations, wherein she and musician/Buffy aficionado Jenny Owen Youngs recap every episode of Veronica Mars from the start.
2. Hear Olly’s new documentary on Archive on Four ‘Please Leave A Message After The Tone‘, all about voicemails.
3. Martin is releasing four albums of new music this year! Hear them at palebirdmusic.com, on the Pale Bird podcast, and on Spotify etc.
4. See Helen and Martin on stage! The Allusionist live tour is landing in cities across North America. Check theallusionist.org/events for listings.
This episode is sponsored by Squarespace, with which you can easily and quickly set up a good-looking website for your projects eg your Oscar-nominated documentary. Visit squarespace.com/answer and get 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain with the discount code ‘answer‘.
As ever, we want your QUESTIONS: send them, in writing or as voice recordings, to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
Be our interfriend at twitter.com/HelenAndOlly and facebook.com/answermethis.
We’ll be back with AMT379 on 7 November 2019, and there’ll be a Retro AMT episode in your feeds on 24 October.
Helen & Olly
••• AMT378 Child-Friendly Rating: 84%. Just a couple of swears; no Rich Content. •••
Tags:animals, As I Was Going To St Ives, attraction, babies, baby, Ben Shephard, beverages, Biddy Baxter, blue lipstick, Blue Peter, breakups, burglary, cats, CCTV, children, cookie, Cookie the cat, Cornwall, cosmetics, counting, Craig David, dates, dating, dogs, drinks, exes, expenses, fetishes, finances, financial, George the tortoise, Harvey Mann, Helen Zaltzman, home security, John Noakes, kombucha, lips, lipstick, lipstick fetish, makeup, Martin Austwick, mathematics, maths, money, neighbors, neighbours, new Manns, nursery rhymes, Olly Mann, pet tortoises, Petra, Petra the dog, pets, physical attraction, relationships, rhymes, riddles, sex, Shep, Socks the cat, Solomon Grundy, St Ives, television, telly, the Hairy Bikers, Toby, toby jugs, Toby Mann, tortoises, TV pets
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January 25, 2016
Gird your loins, unbutton your emotions, because the Answer Me This! Love album is OUT NOW and begging for your affections.
The album features a whole hour of love, sex, dating and genitals, and it’s all completely new AMT material that has never appeared on the podcast. Such as:
♥ Is it appropriate to buy sexy clothes for your mum?
♥ How do you make putting on a condom fun?
♥ Just what is in that liquid squirting out of your girlfriend?
♥ When you’ve lost your engagement ring, how best to style it out?
♥ Is your partner’s schoolgirl fetish something you should worry about? It’s not like he’s a teacher – oh, he is? Oh.
♥ How do you set up a blind date when you’re a blind dater?
♥ How can anyone feel horny at the prospect of a vagina bristling with sharp, spiky horns?
♥ What’s the best point of a wedding ceremony to call it off?
♥ How do they come up with all those lines on Take Me Out?
♥ What is your exhibitionist housemate really trying to show you?
♥ How many holes should there be in a penis?
Here’s a little preview:
Any further questions?
♥ Is this album suitable for me if I’m not at all in the mood for love, sex, or interacting with humanity at all?
YES. If all these people were having such a great time, they wouldn’t be writing to us, would they?
♥ Is this album child-friendly?
HELL NO.
♥ Will this album teach me what it’s like to have the Olly Mann Valentine’s Experience?
YES.
♥ Will Helen say the word ‘urethra’ so many times, I will feel a bit sick?
MAYBE.
You can get it from iTunes and Amazon, but if you want all of your money to go to us and none to Megacorp, buy it directly from the AMT Store.
Tags:albums, AMT Love, animals, aphrodisiacs, arousal, attraction, bathroom, bawdy, blind dates, blindness, bodies, bodily fluids, bodily functions, body parts, boner killers, boners, cards, catchphrases, chat-up lines, chatting up, chemistry, children, cleft palates, climax, clothes, cohabitation, coming, condoms, consent, contraception, contraceptives, courting, courtship, culture, cunnilingus, dates, dating, dating shows, dicks, double dick dude, dressed lobster, dressing up, ejaculate, ejaculation, email, embarrassment, emotions, engagement, engagement rings, erotic, etiquette, etymology, exhibitionism, exhibitionists, families, family, fantasies, fantasy, female ejaculation, fetishes, first moves, flatmates, flirting, fluids, frustration, garments, gender, genitalia, genitals, getting married, gifts, goats, greetings cards, Groupon, Guelphs, honesty, hormones, horns, horny, housemates, internet dating, Japan, Japanese, Kinky Boots, love, lovemaking, lovers, magic tricks, manners, marriage, meat markets, medicine, meeting people, men, messages, Mother's Day, motherhood, mothers, mum, naked, narwhals, nether regions, networking, nudity, nurses, objectification, Olly's mum, online dating, open relationships, oral sex, orgasms, Paddy McGuinness, parents, partners, partnerships, Patrick Macnee, penises, physical, pick-up, prawn, presents, professional, prophylactics, registrars, relations, relationships, relatives, romance, roommates, school, sex, sexual, sexual awakenings, sexual fantasies, sexuality, sexy, sexy nurses, sexy schoolgirls, showers, shy, shyness, sight, Skene's glands, spark, squirters, squirting, stimulation, students, subtlety, Take Me Out, teachers, telly, The Isle of Fernando's, too far, TV, tv shows, urethras, urine, vaginas, Valentine, Valentine's cards, Valentine's Day, vision impairment, wangs, wedding ceremonies, weddings, whoops!, women, words, workplace, writers, yuk
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