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EPISODE 316: God’s packaging

June 11, 2015

In Answer Me This! Episode 316, we have two very different questions concerning overpreparation for death. We also have:

cobbler problems
quinoa
wedding +1s
retirement climates
free salad vs free prawn crackers
cat shit vs cat sick
Mike Oldfield
Metallica Monopoly
soiled lost property
and
popular onions.

Plus: Olly will go on a cruise, as long as it’s free; Helen’s first musical memory is of a cool saboteur; and Martin the Sound Man wants you to slice your own apples and peel your own bananas, you big babies.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iStuff, Android and Windows devices), we continue AMT315‘s discussion of facial hair, and at long last hit on the format that’ll make Olly and Martin into YouTube stars. Or might have, ten years ago.

Thanks very much to Squarespace.com for supporting this episode, and for giving you 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year if you use the code ‘ANSWER‘. If you’ve ever wanted to launch your own website/podcast/blog/online gallery, deploy the code and GET ON WITH IT.

Get on with sending us questions, too: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And commune with us between episodes at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

AMT317 will appear on 25th June 2015. Mark your calendars.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT316 Child-Friendly Rating: 87%. Minimal bawdy talk; just some sweaty undergarments, nothing alarming. A sprinkle of B-grade swears. •••

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Tags:bananas, Bay Area, bequests, board games, bridal party, bridesmaids, California, Canada, cats, cobblers, colleagues, Cornwall, cruises, curry, Daft Punk, death hoaxes, dilemmas, electronic music, flatmates, food, Friends, friendship, fruit, geography, grains, idiots, Indian food, inheritance, kinwa, laundry, legacy, lost property, Mike Oldfield, Monopoly, music, New Zealand, Nile Rodgers, onions, packaging, people being dicks about weddings, pet care, pets, phonetics, places, plane crashes, plus ones, poppadoms, prawn crackers, quinoa, Radio 1, retirement, salad, San Francisco, Squarespace, stupid ideas, summer solstice, supermarkets, takeaway, takeout, Tasmania, temperature, the Azores, Tubular Bells, undergarments, Virgin Records, weather, wedding guests, wedding photos, weddings, wedmin, Weezer, wills
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »

EPISODE 283 – Hobbit Coronation Street

February 13, 2014

Hey! Listeners! What are you doing here? Throw your internet devices to the floor and sprint to Chelmsford in order to be second in the queue (behind this week’s questioneer Melanie) at the new Dunkin’ Donuts opening tomorrow in Chelmsford!

Or if you don’t give many shits about that, sit tight and listen to Answer Me This! Episode 283 instead:

Today we speak of:

coffee beans
giving people ‘the tour’
Terry’s Chocolate Orange
Bruno Mars
sushi vinegar
C3P(ost)O(ffice)
close-up Christopher Lee
Red Hot Chili Peppers
red hot chilli peppers
IHOP vs NASA
the Duracell Bunny vs the Energizer Bunny
Barbie vs Bratz
sad second-rate Sindy
and
the politics of Polly Pocket.

Plus: Olly ruins vinegar for everybody; Helen ruins Mrs Pepperpot for everybody; and Martin the Sound Man ruins ‘Spanish Flea’ for everybody (around the 4-minute mark).

In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (install it on your iDevices, Android and Windows gadgets), we wonder why Heston Blumenthal has not yet mass-produced a meat-filled chocolate orange. Not that we want one.

We do want your QUESTIONS, though: leave voicemails on the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) and deliver emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

Thanks to Squarespace.com for funding this episode; use the code answer2 to snag a 10% discount off their services for a whole year.

We’ll be back on 27th February; in the meantime, listen to Olly on the now-national LBC and Helen on the international-despite-the-name Spark London podcast and Martin on his intergalactic noise-platform.

Byeeee!

Helen & Olly

AMT283 Child-Friendly Rating: 38%. Some swears. Olly talks about his burning genitalia. Speculation about Mrs Pepperpot’s sex life, but in terms a child hopefully won’t fully understand. Intermission features colourful semen. Reference to a Prince Albert that you may have trouble explaining to your youngling.

Mrs Pepperpot dancing around her husband’s member

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Tags:advertising, adverts, American food, animals, Barbie, batteries, Bratz, Bruno Mars, bulls, C3PO, capsaicin, Cate Blanchett, cattle, Charlie Bucket, cheap food, Chelmsford, chilli, chilli con carne, chocolate, Christopher Lee, coffee, coffee beans, coffee creamer, colours, concerts, confectionery, curling, curry, Denny's, dolls, Dunkin Donuts, Duracell, Duracell Bunny, earworms, Energizer, Energizer Bunny, epilepsy, fantasy, fast food, films, Florida, food, Gandalf, genitalia, genitals, George Lucas, gigs, Harrow, Herb Alpert, homes, houses, IHOP, intellectual property, IP, Japanese food, Kim Kardashian, landlords, Lizzie Roper, Lord of the Rings, manatees, marketing, Mattel, medical, movies, Mrs Pepperpot, music, name that tune, Netflix, New Kids on the Block, NKOTB, photosensitive epilepsy, piercings, Polly Pocket, R2D2, Red Hot Chili Peppers, shit food, Shoney's, showing people round, Spanish Flea, Squarespace, stage shows, Star Wars, Starbucks, Stephen Ward, Superbowl, sushi, sushi vinegar, Sylvanian Families, Terry's Chocolate Orange, The Hobbit, the tour, theft, theme tunes, Tijuana Brass, Tolkien, tour, toys, USA, vinegar, Winter Olympics
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »

Best of AMT 2012 part I

December 13, 2012

Hey guys! Remember when we…? And that time when…? And that thing where…? Ah, good times. So many good times! Please join us in reliving half of them in The Best of Answer Me This! 2012 – Part I:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just £1.99 at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

In which we reacquaint ourselves with such beloved old friends as:

The Elves and the Shoemaker
Fabio and Fabio
Hong King Disney
nurse fantasies
the Elgin Marbles
PATP
the seawater cure
Will.I.Am’s nursery rhymes
Pink Lady apples
sexy snowgirls
mad neighbours
bloody Big Bird and dead Kes
Helen’s childhood crush on Inspector Morse
Olly’s kidney
and
Martin the Sound Man’s blue girlfriend.

Plus: drunk callers! Parping! D*ve from Sm*thw*ck!!! And if you enjoyed the assemblage of previously unheard material, ie the blooper reel, you can hear more of that sort of thing every week if you obtain the AMT app for your iDevices and Android.

Join us again next Thursday for the second half of our annual retrospective, and do also supply us with QUESTIONS for AMT 2013. Email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis.

Bye!

Helen & Olly

ALBUMS • iTUNES • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • QUESTION ARCHIVE • FAQ
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Tags:2012, 24, adages, Adam Richman, Affirmation, age, age gaps, Ainsley Harriott, America, Ancient Greece, Andy Kaufman, Anthony Worrall-Thompson, Apple, apples, Arab Strap, atheism, Athens, australia, avian, awkward, babies, babyccino, bands, barbecues, beliefs, Belle and Sebastian, best of, beverages, Big Bird, birds, Black Eyed Peas, bloopers, boardgames, books, branding, brands, British reserve, Butlins, cabbies, cafes, car washing, chains, changing room, chefs, children, Chloe Green, Christianity, Christmas, clips, cocks, cod philosophy, coffee, coins, compilation, condiments, conspiracy theories, cooks, corpses, crabs, crabs' eyes, crime drama, crushes, Crystal Palace, cures, curry, dairy products, Darren Hayes, Dave from Smethwick, dead bodies, death, Delia Smith, Denmark, Diana Rigg, differences, Disney, dragons, drinks, Drive, drunk-dialling, drunks, EAT, economics, Edinburgh, Edinburgh Tattoo, Egypt, EL James, electricals, Elgin Marbles, elves, Elves and the Shoemaker, email, embarrassing bodies, embarrassment, emotional reserve, emotions, entertainment, erotica, etiquette, Eugene, eugenics, evangelism, eyepatch, eyes, Fabio, Fabio and Grooverider, facts, fairy tales, fantasy, fart, Fifty Shades of Grey, films, flatulence, flirting, food, food poisoning, foodstuffs, fountains, France, Frank Black, freebies, French, fruit, Gabrielle, games, gaming, Geena Davis, gender divide, generations, genitalia, genitals, giants, Gloria Hunniford, Golden Delicious, Great Britain, Greece, Greek yoghurt, Gwyneth Paltrow, gym, Heston Blumenthal, Hilary Swank, history, Homeland, homosexuality, Hong Kong, hot towels, hotness, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, India, Indian food, Indian restaurants, inhibition, Inspector Morse, internet, Jim Henson, JLo, jobs, John Thaw, Jon Ronson, jousting, Justin Bieber, Kes, kestels, kidneys, Kratos, Las Vegas, literature, London, Lorraine Pascale, lyrics, Man V Food, marriage, meat, medicine, Mexicans, Michael Buble, Mick Jagger, military, milk, monarchs, money, morals, movies, muppets, music, nakedness, names, Nandos, national stereotypes, neighbours, Nigella Lawson, noise, nudity, nurses, Oasis, Oregon, organ donation, outtakes, parents, Parthenon, PATP, penises, Philip Green, phrases, Ping, pizza, plays, plugs, politeness, ponciness, pop, popstars, prawn, prayer, praying, professions, PS3, relationships, religion, restaurants, retail, romance, royalty, Russell Brand, Salman Rushdie, sausages, Savage Garden, seawater, Sesame Street, sex, Sex Bomb, sex noise, sexual experimentation, sexual fantasies, sexuality, sexy, shoes, singers, snowgirls, snowmen, snowpeople, Sooty, Sophie Dahl, stories, stork, sugar, surnames, taxis, technology, telly, The Killing, theatre, toast, Tom Jones, tourism, towels, Trafalgar Square, transport, Travis Bickle, turkey, TV, TV chefs, Two Fat Ladies, USA, vehicles, Victorians, water, wealth, weddings, weirdos, Will.I.Am, wind, XBox, yoghurt
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EPISODE 223 – Adele is the new Def Leppard

July 12, 2012

Happy wedding anniversary, Henry VIII! Verily on this day in 1543, he married Catherine Parr, and as they say, sixth time’s the charm. According to the Big Book of Weddings, the traditional gift for the 469th anniversary is ‘MP3’, so here’s Answer Me This! Episode 223 for you, you loved-up kids:

Today we contemplate:

speciation
bloody Mary
pub lighting
Def Leppard videos vs. Duran Duran videos
Bieber vs. dopamine
pride vs. prizes
curry house atmosphere
crisp etiquette (US translation: potato chip etiquette)
farm-themed restaurants
sepulchral Hollister
and
that bitch Tinkerbell.

Plus: Olly is mistaken for someone even lower on the celebrity ladder than he is; Helen breaks the bad news that Cain and Abel were motherjeffers; and Martin the Sound Man has something in common with the Queen, other than his fondness for shiny jewels and waving.

This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available on iDevices and Android) demonstrates how Martin paid a woman to write his name on her body. For ‘charity fundraising’, allegedly. Good ruse!

Another good ruse is to send us your QUESTIONS by emailing answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leaving voicemails to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or Skype answermethis). More questions, more podcasts, see?

And don’t forget to click here to check out our latest album, the Answer Me This! Sports Day – the best 59 minutes and 33 seconds of all-new sporty-talk we have ever produced.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly