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EPISODE 316: God’s packaging

June 11, 2015

In Answer Me This! Episode 316, we have two very different questions concerning overpreparation for death. We also have:

cobbler problems
quinoa
wedding +1s
retirement climates
free salad vs free prawn crackers
cat shit vs cat sick
Mike Oldfield
Metallica Monopoly
soiled lost property
and
popular onions.

Plus: Olly will go on a cruise, as long as it’s free; Helen’s first musical memory is of a cool saboteur; and Martin the Sound Man wants you to slice your own apples and peel your own bananas, you big babies.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iStuff, Android and Windows devices), we continue AMT315‘s discussion of facial hair, and at long last hit on the format that’ll make Olly and Martin into YouTube stars. Or might have, ten years ago.

Thanks very much to Squarespace.com for supporting this episode, and for giving you 10% off their website-building and -hosting services for a year if you use the code ‘ANSWER‘. If you’ve ever wanted to launch your own website/podcast/blog/online gallery, deploy the code and GET ON WITH IT.

Get on with sending us questions, too: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And commune with us between episodes at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

AMT317 will appear on 25th June 2015. Mark your calendars.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT316 Child-Friendly Rating: 87%. Minimal bawdy talk; just some sweaty undergarments, nothing alarming. A sprinkle of B-grade swears. •••

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
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Tags:bananas, Bay Area, bequests, board games, bridal party, bridesmaids, California, Canada, cats, cobblers, colleagues, Cornwall, cruises, curry, Daft Punk, death hoaxes, dilemmas, electronic music, flatmates, food, Friends, friendship, fruit, geography, grains, idiots, Indian food, inheritance, kinwa, laundry, legacy, lost property, Mike Oldfield, Monopoly, music, New Zealand, Nile Rodgers, onions, packaging, people being dicks about weddings, pet care, pets, phonetics, places, plane crashes, plus ones, poppadoms, prawn crackers, quinoa, Radio 1, retirement, salad, San Francisco, Squarespace, stupid ideas, summer solstice, supermarkets, takeaway, takeout, Tasmania, temperature, the Azores, Tubular Bells, undergarments, Virgin Records, weather, wedding guests, wedding photos, weddings, wedmin, Weezer, wills
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »

EPISODE 261 – SO delicious

June 13, 2013

Hello listeners,

This week, we learn a few very important lessons about sheep: not to underestimate them intellectually and emotionally; what they have in common with Margaret Thatcher; and what they also have in common with Helen’s mum. Discover these things right now in Answer Me This! Episode 261:

In which we also learn about:

emogothpunk style
Casper the Suicidal Ghost
small-talk with accountants
the losers’ cafe in The Apprentice
BHS Dr Martens
free sunglasses
pony-drawn rollers
the Cabinet vs. the Divine Right of Kings
iced coffee vs. cold coffee
Olly’s face vs. Richard Gere’s face
The All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club
hair-blindness
and
advice from Paul Ross.

Plus: Olly had to go cold turkey on the brown, by which we mean Mr Brown drinks, not heroin; Helen sounds and looks ~~and smells~~ like an old fart; and Martin the Sound Man’s emotional needs are not going to be met by sheep. Let’s not even contemplate whether they can meet his sexual needs, please. But you can meet Martin’s needs by going to his website or YouTube to watch his spectacular new music video (/visual evidence of his nervous breakdown).

In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) Helen expresses her ever-unrealised desire for unusual-coloured hair. She may have wimped out of having an experimental phase in her teens, but when she’s a geriatric she WILL go full-bore Marge Simpson. Promise.

Promise us to send us your QUESTIONS for our next series: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

We’ll be back with AMT262 on 11th July, so please join us then; in the meantime, check back here for our imminent album, the Answer Me This! Holiday, our all-new follow-up to our Top 20 (no really!) albums Jubilee and Sports Day, available for your delectation at answermethispodcast.com/albums.

Byeeee!

Helen & Olly

AMT261 Child-Friendly Rating: 90%.
References to hiding pornographic magazines; very mild profanity.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:accountancy, accountants, added sugar, Alan Sugar, alternative, animals, behind the scenes, beverages, board games, boardrooms, British government, cabinet, cafes, cake, calories, careers, cartoons, Casper the Friendly Ghost, chemicals, child friendly - almost entirely, children, chitchat, chlorine, Christina Ricci, clothes, coffee, concealment, constitutional monarchy, conversation, conversation-killers, croquet, David Lloyd George, death, disapproval, divorce law, Dr Martens, dress, drinks, emo, Escape from Colditz, etymology, fascinating, fashion, filming, garments, ghosts, goth, government, hair, hair colour, hair dye, haircare, hairstyles, Harvey Comics, hiding places, history, holidays, iced coffee, inscrutability, inside scoop, jobs, King George I, King George II, King James I, litotes, London, Lord Sugar, Margaret Thatcher, monarchy, mums, night, Norfolk, Norwich, Parliament, Paul Ross, politics, Postman Pat, prawn, punk, Richard Gere, sheep, sleep, sleeping, slumber, small talk, sport, stoicism, Streatham, style, sunglasses, supernatural, swimming, swimming caps, taste, teenage, teenagers, telly, tennis, The All England Lawn Tennis and Croquet Club, the apprentice, The Sixth Sense, This American Life, TV, TV studios, vacation, Wimbledon
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »

EPISODE 243 – romper suit with a bow tie

January 24, 2013

Good morning listeners,

Today, we set you some coursework. We need you to conduct practical experiments into Thorntons‘ personalised icing policies, and report the results with illustrative materials. Your challenge is fully explained in Answer Me This! Episode 243:

Wherein we contemplate:

Roland Wank
elephant gelatine
Frankel
Milky Way
Percy Pig and Pals confectionery counterfeits
Game On
cutlery rules
bow tie rules
Monopoly real estate
dishwasher doors
Rizla+
Bill Bottrell
Mr Mars
Olympics keyrings
Brent Dixon’s keychains
the mystery of ‘Black or White’
and
onesies.

Plus: Olly admits that he likes to be infantilised, to the surprise of nobody; Helen finds out where to pass ‘Go’, but nobody gives her £200; and capitalist Martin the Sound Man gets trumped playing Socialist Monopoly.

In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) we discuss Channel 4’s Wank Week, which never aired because it was too classy for their schedules.

Don’t think you’re too classy to send us your QUESTIONS: all are welcome, so email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, or leave a voicemail on the Question Line 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

PS Remember, every week you can receive an extra shot of us talking if you listen to BBC 5 Live’s Let’s Talk About Tech podcast.
PPS You can receive numerous extra shots of Martin the Sound Man by seeking out his myriad other podcasts: The Sound of the Ladies podcast, the Brain Train podcast, the Global Lab podcast…

ALBUMS • iTUNES • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • QUESTION ARCHIVE • FAQ
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:Albuquerque, appliances, awkward, Bill Bottrell, Black or White, board games, bow ties, Breaking Bad, candy, capitalism, charts, Chippendales, chocolate, cigarettes, class, collecting, collections, commercial radio, confectionery, copies, copying, cutlery, deprivatisation, dishwashers, Disney, Durham, eating, Eric the Elephant, etiquette, etymology, fashion, Fenchurch Street, forks, France, French, Galaxy, Game On, gelatine, glass, Harry Styles, Hear'Say, hoarders, hoarding, hot water, infantilisation, interviews, iTunes, jellies, jobs, Keith Lemon, keychains, keyrings, Lambeth, LaToya Jackson, London, London 2012, London Olympics, LTB, M&S, Macaulay Culkin, Marks & Spencer, Mars, masturbation, Mayfair, men's fashion, merch, Michael Jackson, Milky Way, Monopoly, music, musicals, Myleene Klass, mysteries, nationalisation, neckwear, nougat, number 1, Olympics, onanism, onesies, Ordnance Survey, Oxford Street, Pall Mall, Percy Pigs, pop music, pork, puns, racehorses, radio, Radio 1, rap, record industry, record sales, Rizla, rolling papers, romper suits, Sainsburys, Samantha Janus, sexual harrassment, singles, slang, smoking, snobbery, socialism, space, spoons, steam, style, styles, sweets, table manners, The Colonel, This Is It, Thorntons, ties, tobacco, Top 40, upper class, Waitrose, wank, Westfield, words, work, Zooey Deschanel
Posted in PODCASTS | 3 Comments »

EPISODE 174 – the Cupboard of Solitary Pleasure

April 7, 2011

Dear listeners,

Here is Answer Me This! Episode 174. Cherish it. Savour it. For it is the penultimate episode before we take a holiday until May. Aw, quit blubbing, you’ll set us off as well…

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Today we consider:

Tony Blair’s fortune
fireman’s poles
Barbie cakes
pretty jellyfish
Home on Their Own
Chartwell
southpaw mathematicians vs. rhubarb
John Major vs. Rufus Hound
Paul O’Grady’s fake shed vs. John Wayne Gacy
This Morning‘s head-shrinker
Cluedo, the telly quiz adaptation
post-prime ministerial perks
Catalog Living
Britney’s derriere
and
the new face of Blue Harbour.

Plus: Olly shows the ladies a good time in Wood Green; Helen dusts off her good manners in order to tell you that your flies are undone; and Martin the Sound Man WAS NOT LOOKING AT ANYTHING IN HIS PRIVATE BROWSER, alright? This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (find it on iPhone or Android) tells how Olly beat the charity auction system, because even altruists love a bargain.

You’ll be needing noises to destroy the sweet sound of silence while we’re away, so go to answermethispodcast.com/audible to get yourself free and half-price audiobooks. And to send this series out in a blaze of glory, please delight us with your QUESTIONS for next week: leave voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or find answermethis on Skype) or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. It’ll be something to remember you by on our vacation; like a knot in a hankie, a pressed flower in the pages of a Bible, or a repent-at-leisure tattoo of your face.

See you next week!

Helen & Olly