Nigella Lawson | Answer Me This! Podcast

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EPISODE 289 – Claire Sweeney’s raw crumpets

May 8, 2014

Apologies to Gina G for the theme in Answer Me This! Episode 289. YOU WERE ROBBED, GINA! The injustice smarts as much now as it did in 1996! Neva 4get!*

On today’s agenda:

Pret a Manger
ladies ‘freshening up’
homecoming queen
wood-panelled station wagons
red Solo cups
60 Minute Makeover
the Mosquito Alarm vs turds
stealing leftovers
Olly’s schoolboy politics
Marlene from Neighbours
Four Weddings and a Funeral vs The Inbetweeners vs Trainspotting
Skype calls with your parents
pebbledash (again!)
the cloakroom
Peter Andre’s career
and
Nigella Lawson’s handbag condiments.

Plus: abandoned milkshakes bring all the Olly Manns to the yard; Helen tries to become the Barbara Woodhouse of effusive emailers; and please excuse Martin the Sound Man, he’s just off for a ‘bio-break’.

We’re talking brown sludge in this week’s Bit of Crap on the App, albeit not the same kind of brown sludge as covering the lawns at the beginning of this episode, or being emitted by ladies under the cover of Euphemisms. The tide of not-effluent is available for iDevices, Android or Windows gadgets.

There’s also a shitload more bonus material here – the full-length interviews we did with podcasters including Marc Maron, Roman Mars, Night Vale, Keith and the Girl, Dan Savage and the Bugle for our Radio 4 documentary Podcasting: The First Ten Years. So head over there if you’re interested in hearing Helen talk shop with other podcasters; Olly’s interviews will be added to the playlist shortly.

Many thanks to Squarespace.com, who have not only funded today’s podcast, but also offer you 10% off their services for a whole year if you use the code Answer when making your website-building dreams become reality.

Make our question-answering dreams become reality for the 290th time: call the Question Line (call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis) or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And you are of course welcome to join us at facebook.com/answermethis and/or twitter.com/HelenAndOlly to discuss your findings following this episode.

Until AMT290 on 22nd May, farewell,

Helen & Olly

••• AMT289 Child-Friendly Rating: 68%. Early scatchat. A few strong swears. Largely harmless overall. •••

*We’re sure Gina G is reading this from the secret clubhouse where she, Sonia and Love City Groove retreat to shoot spitballs at a cardboard cutout of Katrina and the Waves.

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Tags:60 Minute Makeover, 60MM, alcohol, America, Americana, bathrooms, bodily functions, Bridget Jones, Brownies, cafes, cars, children, Children of the Universe, Claire Sweeney, climbing wall, cloakrooms, communication, crumpets, cups, curses, decor, deterrents, dilemmas, etiquette, euphemisms, Eurovision, eurovision song contest, family, fraud, gardens, gender differences, gender divide, Gina G, Griswolds, head boy, high frequency, high school, home makeovers, Homecoming queen, homes, houses, Jerusalem, Jordan, Katie Price, kids, ladies, ladies' secrets, lavatorial, lavatories, lawns, loo, Marge Simpson, Marlene Kratz, Masters of the Universe, milkshakes, Mosquito Alarm, movie tropes, movies, neighbors, neighbourhood, neighbours, Nigella Lawson, Olly's mum, orange juice, pebbledash, Peter Andre, podcasts, PR, Pret, Pret a Manger, private property, problems, prom, red Solo cups, render, restrooms, school, school dances, Skyler White, Skype, station wagons, stealing, stucco, telly, The Inbetweeners, toilet, tropes, turds, TV, USA, vehicles, wood, wood trim
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Best of AMT 2012 part I

December 13, 2012

Hey guys! Remember when we…? And that time when…? And that thing where…? Ah, good times. So many good times! Please join us in reliving half of them in The Best of Answer Me This! 2012 – Part I:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just £1.99 at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

In which we reacquaint ourselves with such beloved old friends as:

The Elves and the Shoemaker
Fabio and Fabio
Hong King Disney
nurse fantasies
the Elgin Marbles
PATP
the seawater cure
Will.I.Am’s nursery rhymes
Pink Lady apples
sexy snowgirls
mad neighbours
bloody Big Bird and dead Kes
Helen’s childhood crush on Inspector Morse
Olly’s kidney
and
Martin the Sound Man’s blue girlfriend.

Plus: drunk callers! Parping! D*ve from Sm*thw*ck!!! And if you enjoyed the assemblage of previously unheard material, ie the blooper reel, you can hear more of that sort of thing every week if you obtain the AMT app for your iDevices and Android.

Join us again next Thursday for the second half of our annual retrospective, and do also supply us with QUESTIONS for AMT 2013. Email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis.

Bye!

Helen & Olly

ALBUMS • iTUNES • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • QUESTION ARCHIVE • FAQ
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:2012, 24, adages, Adam Richman, Affirmation, age, age gaps, Ainsley Harriott, America, Ancient Greece, Andy Kaufman, Anthony Worrall-Thompson, Apple, apples, Arab Strap, atheism, Athens, australia, avian, awkward, babies, babyccino, bands, barbecues, beliefs, Belle and Sebastian, best of, beverages, Big Bird, birds, Black Eyed Peas, bloopers, boardgames, books, branding, brands, British reserve, Butlins, cabbies, cafes, car washing, chains, changing room, chefs, children, Chloe Green, Christianity, Christmas, clips, cocks, cod philosophy, coffee, coins, compilation, condiments, conspiracy theories, cooks, corpses, crabs, crabs' eyes, crime drama, crushes, Crystal Palace, cures, curry, dairy products, Darren Hayes, Dave from Smethwick, dead bodies, death, Delia Smith, Denmark, Diana Rigg, differences, Disney, dragons, drinks, Drive, drunk-dialling, drunks, EAT, economics, Edinburgh, Edinburgh Tattoo, Egypt, EL James, electricals, Elgin Marbles, elves, Elves and the Shoemaker, email, embarrassing bodies, embarrassment, emotional reserve, emotions, entertainment, erotica, etiquette, Eugene, eugenics, evangelism, eyepatch, eyes, Fabio, Fabio and Grooverider, facts, fairy tales, fantasy, fart, Fifty Shades of Grey, films, flatulence, flirting, food, food poisoning, foodstuffs, fountains, France, Frank Black, freebies, French, fruit, Gabrielle, games, gaming, Geena Davis, gender divide, generations, genitalia, genitals, giants, Gloria Hunniford, Golden Delicious, Great Britain, Greece, Greek yoghurt, Gwyneth Paltrow, gym, Heston Blumenthal, Hilary Swank, history, Homeland, homosexuality, Hong Kong, hot towels, hotness, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, India, Indian food, Indian restaurants, inhibition, Inspector Morse, internet, Jim Henson, JLo, jobs, John Thaw, Jon Ronson, jousting, Justin Bieber, Kes, kestels, kidneys, Kratos, Las Vegas, literature, London, Lorraine Pascale, lyrics, Man V Food, marriage, meat, medicine, Mexicans, Michael Buble, Mick Jagger, military, milk, monarchs, money, morals, movies, muppets, music, nakedness, names, Nandos, national stereotypes, neighbours, Nigella Lawson, noise, nudity, nurses, Oasis, Oregon, organ donation, outtakes, parents, Parthenon, PATP, penises, Philip Green, phrases, Ping, pizza, plays, plugs, politeness, ponciness, pop, popstars, prawn, prayer, praying, professions, PS3, relationships, religion, restaurants, retail, romance, royalty, Russell Brand, Salman Rushdie, sausages, Savage Garden, seawater, Sesame Street, sex, Sex Bomb, sex noise, sexual experimentation, sexual fantasies, sexuality, sexy, shoes, singers, snowgirls, snowmen, snowpeople, Sooty, Sophie Dahl, stories, stork, sugar, surnames, taxis, technology, telly, The Killing, theatre, toast, Tom Jones, tourism, towels, Trafalgar Square, transport, Travis Bickle, turkey, TV, TV chefs, Two Fat Ladies, USA, vehicles, Victorians, water, wealth, weddings, weirdos, Will.I.Am, wind, XBox, yoghurt
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EPISODE 174 – the Cupboard of Solitary Pleasure

April 7, 2011

Dear listeners,

Here is Answer Me This! Episode 174. Cherish it. Savour it. For it is the penultimate episode before we take a holiday until May. Aw, quit blubbing, you’ll set us off as well…

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Today we consider:

Tony Blair’s fortune
fireman’s poles
Barbie cakes
pretty jellyfish
Home on Their Own
Chartwell
southpaw mathematicians vs. rhubarb
John Major vs. Rufus Hound
Paul O’Grady’s fake shed vs. John Wayne Gacy
This Morning‘s head-shrinker
Cluedo, the telly quiz adaptation
post-prime ministerial perks
Catalog Living
Britney’s derriere
and
the new face of Blue Harbour.

Plus: Olly shows the ladies a good time in Wood Green; Helen dusts off her good manners in order to tell you that your flies are undone; and Martin the Sound Man WAS NOT LOOKING AT ANYTHING IN HIS PRIVATE BROWSER, alright? This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (find it on iPhone or Android) tells how Olly beat the charity auction system, because even altruists love a bargain.

You’ll be needing noises to destroy the sweet sound of silence while we’re away, so go to answermethispodcast.com/audible to get yourself free and half-price audiobooks. And to send this series out in a blaze of glory, please delight us with your QUESTIONS for next week: leave voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or find answermethis on Skype) or send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. It’ll be something to remember you by on our vacation; like a knot in a hankie, a pressed flower in the pages of a Bible, or a repent-at-leisure tattoo of your face.

See you next week!

Helen & Olly