Posts Tagged ‘etiquette’
February 17, 2011
MISSING: 35-year-old man, answers to the name ‘Nelly’. Last seen wearing a backwards cap and a T-shirt 5 sizes too big for him. If anyone has information leading to the safe return of Nelly, please call 0800-555-RECENTWORKDIDNOTMAKEANIMPACTINTHEUKCHARTS.
Then, while you wait anxiously for news, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 167:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
It’s not just Nelly missing. Where’s Wally? Where’s Waldo? Where’s Walter? It’s an epidemic of missing men… But not missing podcast-topics, which this week include:
electoral register unfairness
fake tan lines
John Krasinski
D-locks
Martin Handford
Lake Havasu City
TK Maxx vs. TJ Maxx
Walkers Crisps vs. the American War of Independence
the kingdom of Mercia vs. the kingdom of Wessex
Roger Federer vs. William Tell
Harry Potter vs. Queen Victoria
inappropriate poetry corner
massivesnouts.com
passive-aggressive chairs
Soulwax
the wrong London Bridge
the Ponte Vecchio
and
Mark Foster (whoooooo?).
Plus: Olly touches himself up – just in Photoshop, of course; Helen enjoys her own smutty courtroom drama; and Martin the Sound Man tells you what is cool – this is. So that’s 70s revival and spindly bridges on the style list for spring/summer 2011, OK?
This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iPhone or Android) is a question from Ken in Brooklyn about the pickelhaube, one of the few headgear-styles yet to be revived by hipsters. Give them a few more weeks.
Now rack your brains for QUESTIONS, then send them to us in voicemail form to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or findanswermethis on Skype) or as emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Then we can weave more podcasts out of them. Score!
See you next week,
Helen & Olly
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Tags:Adam Ant, adaptations, America, American football, Arizona, arrow, arse, Barack Obama, barristers, Belgians, Belgium, Bernard Butler, Boadicea, books, Boudicca, Bourne, bridges, British Empire, British legal system, California, Canary Wharf, candids, celebrities, chairs, Christopher Lloyd, cinema, court, courtrooms, crime, crotch, CSI, Cupid, dentistry, Ed Balls, Elvis, emotions, etiquette, fake tan, fame, Fergie, fiction, fictional characters, film rights, films, Florence, Florence and the Machine, foreign adaptations, friendship, furniture, garlic, genitalia, genitals, German, Germany, gods, halitosis, Hercule Poirot, history, hygiene, innuendo, JFK, John Cusack, John Krasinski, judges, juries, jury, jury duty, jury service, lawyers, Lays, legal system, London, London Bridge, love, Madonna, market research, masturbation, Michael Jackson, Millennium Bridge, morality, motherhood, movie adaptations, movies, myth, Neil Simon, Nickelodeon, office politics, OJ Simpson, oral hygiene, overstepping boundaries, pelvic floor, petty grievances, photography, Poirot, pornography, Queen Elizabeth, Queen Victoria, Rafa Nadal, rivers, Roman Empire, Romans, Ronald Reagan, sex, sexy photos, Shakespeare, sport, Suede, Superbowl, Switzerland, tanning, tennis, the Queen, theater, theatre, Universal, USA, Walkers, Wally, wanking, war paint, Where's Waldo, Where's Wally, Zurich
Posted in PODCASTS | 11 Comments »
May 20, 2010
Hello there listeners,
For reasons outlined therein, we’re yawning and stretching during Answer Me This! Episode 136; but we sincerely hope you don’t:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
On today’s call sheet are topics including:
iron ore
Hereford Cathedral’s record-breaking library
abseiling
Jo Whiley’s washing tips
fishy Ashton Kutcher
chopsticks vs. cutlery
stripey horses vs. horned horses
communion wafers vs. transubstantiated flesh
Mel Gibson vs. Bob Dylan’s Planet Waves
pox vs. coma
weather houses
whitebait
Martika
grey hair
and
blue movies.
Furthermore: Olly only publicly relieves himself the classiest way; Helen shuns bridesmaids; and Martin the Sound Man is a silver fox, although hopefully not the same one that pissed in Olly’s trainers, or fisticuffs will ensue.
We also contemplate what makes us feel aged; proceed to the comments on this post to share your own. Although if you are only half our age, don’t. You are mere saplings, so enjoy that while we wheeze and wobble along the path of physical and mental decline.
Old or young, you are all very welcome to send us a QUESTION, so please do that by leaving a voice message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis or by sending an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
See you next Thursday!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:1990s, Asia, awkward, Backstreet Boys, bad friends, best man, birthsongs, boarding school, breakdown, brides, bridesmaids, bridezillas, calories, China, Christianity, cutlery, David Cameron, diets, digital rights management, dim sum, eating, etiquette, etymology, films, fish, fish fingers, food, Forever Young, foxes, France, Grosse Point Blank, Heinz, Hereford Cathedral, insomnia, international cuisine, Jamiroquai, Jesus, kitsch, La Roux, Lizzie Roper, marine life, Martika, Martin White, matrimony, Mini, motoring, movies, myth, mythical beasts, Olly's car, Olly's mum, ornaments, parents, personal challenges, phobias, pornography, prawn, rally, record breakers, religion, Rupert Murdoch, school, sheep, sleep, Tom Price, unicorns, weddings, wildlife, world's biggest, youth, yuk, zebras
Posted in PODCASTS | 13 Comments »
January 28, 2010
Yaaaaaaaaawwwnn!!!
Forgive us, but we’re all tired out at the end of this series of Answer Me This! – it’s been our longest one so far! And while we’re off on our anecdote-gathering trips in February, we want you to do a little something for us. Something fun and exciting. Find out what in Episode 124:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
On the agenda today are:
the cockblocking face of Gareth Gates
True Blood
SOHCAHTOA
Fatal Attraction
cuddling vs. cortisol
Mitchell’n’Webb
nudie pics
mad actors
The Reader
the sexy Saw ride
and
Aslan.
Plus: Olly takes umbrage with ancient Canadian traditions; Helen totally fails the 1990s Culture module at the University of Life; and Martin the Sound Man doesn’t want to see any of those nasty films with boffing in them, OK? So stop sending him copies of Nine Songs in the post!
Now, it’s with great solemnity that we bid adieu to you until 4th March – but make sure we come back with a bang by supplying us with YOUR QUESTIONS, via answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877. We look forward to hearing from you, and hopefully you will look forward to hearing from us. You might also be looking forward to hearing a free Audible audiobook, which you can get HERE. That should obliterate a few hours of silence while we’re off air, no?
Please treat yourselves nicely during February, and we’ll see you right back here before you know it!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:adoption, bigamy, celebrity, dentistry, dilemmas, embarrassment, etiquette, hugs, hygiene, Julia Roberts, love, marriage, mental health, money, movies, names, Olly's cat, opera, parents, prawn, psychos, relationships, restaurants, Richard Gere, romance, royalty, sex, teeth, True Blood, Up, USA
Posted in PODCASTS | Leave a Comment »
January 7, 2010
Welcome, listeners, to the first Answer Me This! of 2010:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In which we speak of:
the Next sales
Sherlock Holmes
sweetbreads
condominiums
the son of Sam
Golden Wonder
Stanley Kubrick
the Queen’s Speech
Scotch woodcock
Johnny Carson
snake lungs
Anne Frank
and
the best public lavatories in Balham.
Furthermore: Olly manages to draw comparison between Lolita and Match of the Day; Helen manages to draw comparison between estate agents and kidnapped children; and Martin the Sound Man manages to draw comparison between a suitable Christmas present for his girlfriend and a DVD boxset about serial killers. Let’s hope he didn’t buy it for research purposes.
We’ve a list of chores for you to do this week:
1) click here to get yourself a free Audible audiobook;
2) share your neuroses, like shark-fearing questioneer Bunty did, in a comment on this post;
3) decide for the world whether humans are red meat or white meat by voting in this poll
4) if you’re still steaming about Walkers Crisps’ packet colours (and frankly, we aren’t), sign the petition;
5) listen to Martin the Sound Man’s latest music podcast;
6) and, of course, send us YOUR QUESTIONS for future episodes, via answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877.
So, after you’ve done all those, we’ll see you next week for Episode 122!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:bodies, booze, bowels, business, cannibalism, cheese, colleagues, Come Dine With Me, crisps, disease, Dutch, estate agents, etiquette, etymology, faux pas, films, food, health, liver, Lolita, marine life, maritime, Martin White, meat, movies, naval, neuroses, Olly's cat, organs, perversion, pork, racist phrases, reptiles, shame, sharks, slang, snakes, surgery, table manners, Wales, workplace
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November 5, 2009
Oh dearie dear. Our coverage in Episode 115 of Reggie’s epilepsy dog/girlfriend dilemma seems to have resulted in a resolution – but not a happy one. You lot voted, while Reggie’s girlfriend voted with her feet. Commiserations, Reggie, although you’ve still got the cat to comfort you, eh?
Anyway, let’s hope that we don’t destroy any more relationships in Answer Me This! Episode 116:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Wherein we discuss:
Tesco Finest creamy fish pie
Hugh Laurie’s face trumpet
our Helge Rubinstein campaign 
Maidstone
Stingy Jack
things to do in Rye
Russell Howard vs. William Hague
salmonella
politicised Peter’s Friends
freestanding baths
Bliss Magazine
Harry Potter
and
the world’s grossest bikini.
Plus: Olly has a novel method of keeping those trick-or-treaters away; Helen blurts out the Sensational Secret that her family revealed just 29 1/2 years ago; and Martin the Sound Man sets a challenge for the Olympic Committee. He’s got pluck, it’s true.
As well as sending us YOUR QUESTIONS – which you can do by emailing answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or voicemailing Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877 – this week we also want to hear your stories of your finest ancestors and your own best moments of fame. Dazzle us all by posting a comment below!
Over and out,
Helen and Olly
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Tags:anatomy, bowels, cats, etiquette, fish, food, Halloween, money, Olly's cat, parties, pets, politics, sex, sport, stupid traditions, tax, yuk
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »
October 22, 2009
What the Jazzy Jeff is going on with Answer Me This! Episode 114? It’s all full of SPORT! Bloody sport! Golf, boxing, Formula 1 AND the Cinnamon Challenge. We feel like traitors to our own podcast.
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Thankfully, there’s less jocktacular business too, such as:
scurvy (again)
bridge rolls
Helge Rubinstein
Napoleon Dynamite
Acton bowling alley
Wanted
Johnny Ball Reveals All
butter vs. Banoffee Pie
Sean Kingston vs. Sean Paul
D.H. Lawrence
James McAvoy
and
the band Clock.
Plus: Olly suggests Angelina Jolie is ‘a bloke with tits, really’ AND manages to compare Cheryl Cole to a golf ball; Helen hopes that Auntie Tarantula isn’t listening to this episode; and Martin the Sound Man breaks the embargo on talking about balls, earning him 14 hours on the naughty step. Will he never learn?
Unfortunately Episode 115 will be out one day late next week; but if you need something to tide you over Thursday, perhaps this tract upon the benefits of dimples to the trajectory of golf balls, this will help. (I’m sure you’ll understand why we kept it brief in the podcast – laminar flow diagrams don’t come across so well in audio.) And you can help tide us over with YOUR QUESTIONS: email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave a voicemail on Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877.
See you next Friday!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:baked goods, balls, best man, boxing, cake, cars, cookery, disease, driving, etiquette, family, farting, folly, food, golf, homoeroticism, literature, marriage, music, names, nicknames, racism, sport, Women In Love
Posted in PODCASTS | 4 Comments »
June 4, 2009
Listeners, we’re afraid that the day has come: it’s the last episode of the series! We’re sure you can cope; you seem like an emotionally sturdy bunch. And if our absence does prove too hard to bear, check out Episodes 1-40 for another 15+ hours of our company. Or, alternatively, our Early Learning Curve will make you miss us a lot less.
Anyway, on with today’s show, which is of course Episode 98:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In which there are:
party whistles
big bands
pot pourri
Ben Folds
‘Happy Birthday’
oestrogen
the Nottingham Eye
glottal stops
Michelle Pfeiffer
TGI Friday
cat grass
and
The Ivy festivity FAIL.
Plus: in trying out the kind of etymological web-research that Helen usually does, Olly finds himself in a whole world of Rude; Helen gives some surefire tips to repel potential flatmates; and Martin the Sound Man generally behaves himself, probably distracted by the fact that he has a new live EP out and you lovely chaps can download it for FREE from thesoundoftheladies.com/music
This being Episode 98, I’m sure the mathematical among you have clocked that our 100th episode is fast approaching. Naturally, we will not be letting our passage into triple figures go unmarked, and at the end of the episode we reveal how we’re celebrating it. Our Facebook Fanclub alone will be privy to how you too can be with us for the party of the century day, so join it stat!
Other than that, please do stay in touch while we’re away by sending us your QUESTIONS for the next series: call 0208 123 5877, Skype answermethis or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And even though we’re giving our voices a rest, we’ll still be putting bits and bobs up on this website throughout our break, so do come visit; and we’ll see you back here on July 9th for Episode 99!
Love,
Helen and Olly
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Tags:appendix, Arabic, B&Q, birthdays, cats, Catwoman, cohabitation, diets, DIY, embarrassment, emergency surgery, etiquette, exes, household, Kristin Hersh, pets, petty grievances, prolapse, Scarborough, sex, TGI Fridays, tourist traps, university
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »
April 22, 2009
** Click here for Episode 91 **
Here’s a charming story from James, entitled ‘My Friend Recently Shit Himself’. Can you guess how it’s going to go? Well done, you are correct:
Yes it was quite an epic tale, cram packed with adventure, tension and embarrassment.
The story began on Saturday morning when we were having a bite to eat before catching the train to Sheffield from Grimsby. My friend, who wishes to remain anonymous, claimed to be feeling ill about halfway through the journey. When we arrived he insisted (in a rather flustered manner) that we find the nearest toilet which at the time happened to be a McDonalds, so off we went. He ran in barging people out of the way (we followed closely behind to see what hilarities would unfold) and just as he was going into the toilet he shat himself.
But the worst thing about this is what he did to ‘solve’ the situation, he started by frantically wiping his pants and arse with toilet paper until they were as clean as they could possibly be at that time…………not very clean. He then put them back on inside out and continued his activities for the rest of the day.
I found this odd/sickening and was wondering what would you do in a situation like that?
To be frank, we found it pretty odd/sickening as well; therefore, as we’ve just had our lunch and are reluctant to throw it all up, we thought we’d open the question out to you instead. So please comment below and answer us this: what is a failsafe means of rescuing yourself should you wind up in a similar situation?
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Tags:bowels, disgusting, etiquette, public transport, sartoria, shame
Posted in extracurricular questions | 12 Comments »
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