morality | Answer Me This! Podcast

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The Best of AMT 2015

December 24, 2015

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just £1.99 at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Join us for a jaunt through The Best of Answer Me This! 2015, where we revisit such bright spots from the year as:

Paul Simon Says
Buddha, fat and thin
the Stephen King’s IT tattoo
the CKBLT (Chicken Kiev BLT sandwich)
Jurassic Park: The Ballet
Juliet’s balcony
Grumpy Cat
Melanie Griffith’s lion
Nicolas Cage’s octopus
Andre Rieu’s face
highlighter pen(i)s
undead Mike Oldfield
wedding +1 etiquette
Byrd Sister
Greek wine
dominatrix problems
and
olive theft.

And, as every year, there are the Previously Unheard Bits of AMT, plus our favourite: the Melancholy Voicemail Parade.

Haven’t heard the Best Of AMT collections from previous years? Get them at answermethisstore.com/best. All the hits, none of the shits!

Also while you’re at the AMT store, you can buy our classic episodes, albums and apps. By doing so, you’re supporting the show – and obliterating the howling silence, right?

Send in your questions for AMT in 2016: leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Befriend us online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll return with AMT330 on 14th January 2016. Happy Christmas/New Year/early January to you all, and thanks for listening this year.

Helen & Olly

••• Best of 2015 Child-Friendly Rating: 50%. As in, 50% of the content is child-friendly. The other 50% really isn’t. You know the score by now. •••

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Tags:2015, Andre Rieu, Andrew Lloyd Webber, animals, Audrey Hepburn, babies, bacon sandwiches, Bad Blood, ballet, beards, Ben Lashes, best of, Bluetooth, books, Budai, Buddha, Buddhism, Capulets, cats, celebrity animals, celebrity pets, chatrooms, Cheshire, chicken, chicken and egg, chicken kiev, children, class, cock shy, cocks, coconut shy, coconuts, cruises, daddy, dance, death hoaxes, deep sea submersibles, deer, dominatrix, drupes, eggs, Elvis Presley, fairground attractions, feet, Fern Britton, films, folk festivals, food, Friends, friendship, fun, games, genitals, Greek wine, green hair, Grumpy Cat, highlighter pens, history, Hollywood, Hollywood pets, Home Alone, infants, inverse snobbery, Italy, Jeremy Corbyn, Juliet, Juliet's balcony, Jurassic Park, kangaroos, lavender, Lil Bub, lions, literature, love, marriage, memes, Mike Oldfield, money, Moonlight Shadow, morality, morals, movies, mummy, music, musicals, Nandos, National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Neil the Lion, Nicolas Cage, not fun, novels, octopus, olive bars, olive theft, olives, parenting, parents, Paul Simon, penises, people being dicks about weddings, pets, poshness, procreation, pub quiz, quinoa, relationships, religion, Romeo and Juliet, sandwiches, sex, Shakespeare, shopping, shops, Simon and Garfunkel, Simon Says, small feet, small penises, snobbery, stealing, Stephen King, Stephen King's It, submersibles, supermarkets, symbols, Tardar Sauce, tattoos, Taylor Swift, theatre, theft, Tippi Hedren, toddlers, TS Eliot, Tubular Bells, Verona, weddings, wild beasts, William Shakespeare
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »

EPISODE 225 – Let the camel see the canoe

July 26, 2012

When you woke up this morning, listeners, did you realise this would be the day that Olly revealed how he is in possession of the local equivalent of one of John Wayne Gacy’s prison paintings?

Well, it is that day. Assuming you go ahead and listen to Answer Me This! Episode 225 rather than choose to continue living in ignorance:

Wherein we contemplate:

Danny Boyle
morality in musicals
shouting at children
Ramadan for Olympians
masks
hippie housemates
Maroon 5 vs. pole vaulters
Chicago vs. Bury St Edmunds
Outer Mongolia vs. Darkest Peru
Mrs Lovett vs. Wagamama
the Phantom of the Opera vs. The Collector
Timbuktu
what Mein Kampf is missing (aside from a GSOH of course)
ostentatious eccentricity
~~nooks and~~ crannies
Coinstar
Hitler’s watercolours
and
Sesame Snaps.

Plus: climbing upon Nelson’s Column, Olly almost exposes his own column; Helen misses the cupboard in which she hid from childhood; and Martin the Sound Man discovers his spirit flower.

This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available on iDevices and Android) includes the next episode in the series begun by Lauren from Brooklyn in AMT224, ‘Is it OK to steal?’ In today’s thrilling installment, Mike from Crofton Park asks whether he’s allowed to steal his broadband package. How can it be stealing when you can’t even SEE it, right?

If, like Mike and Lauren, you’re tussling with your moral compass – or any other query is bothering you – allow us to solve your problems for you: send your QUESTIONS as voicemails to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or Skype answermethis) or emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.

You should click here if you’re in the market for a hippie-proof AMT mug, which must be nigh indestructable if it’s survived five years in our company. If you want to survive 59 minutes 33 seconds more of our company, please invest in the AMT Sports Day too, because on the eve of the Olympics, it would be impolite not to.

See you next Thursday,

Helen & Olly

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Tags:Adolf Hitler, Africa, Algeria, Andrew Lloyd Webber, Anna Ford, art, artists, athletes, athletics, Azawad, Baker Street, Barack Obama, beast, Beauty and the Beast, Big Brother, bland art, bodily fluids, Bury St Edmunds, cash, Charles Bronson, Chicago, children, cohabitation, coins, coppers, crannies, criminals, crockery, crops, cups, currency, Damon Albarn, Danny Boyle, deserts, destruction, detox, dictators, discipline, eccentricity, economy, evil paintings, fasting, finance, five pillars of Islam, flatmates, Fleet Street, flowers, food, good vs evil, health food, hippies, Hitler's paintings, household disputes, housemates, illustrations, Islam, Julian Opie, Kermit the Frog, Khaled Belabbes, kids, legal tender, letters, London, London 2012, Mali, Maroon 5, masks, Mein Kampf, Mitt Romney, Mongolia, morality, mugs, music, musical theatre, musicals, Muslims, Nelson's Column, nooks, nutters, oil, Olly's school, Olympic torch, Olympics, opening ceremony, Paddington, paintings, pennies, Peru, Phantom of the Opera, Phillip Schofield, pictures, plants, pole vault, primary school, prison, prison art, prisoners, psychopathy, Quasimodo, Ramadan, reading, religion, religious laws, Rihanna, Roald Dahl, school, seeds, sesame, sesame oil, sesame seeds, Sesame Snaps, shouting, small change, soundtracks, souvenirs, sport, sportsmen, squats, Starsailor, steeplechase, sterling, Sweeney Todd, teachers, teaching, telly, The Mask, the smell of fear, theatre, This Morning, Tim Buckley, Tim Rice, Timbuktu, torch relay, Trafalgar Square, TV, Vanessa Feltz, Wagamama, Wand Erection, watercolour, White House
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »

EPISODE 167 – like Oprah with bad breath

February 17, 2011

MISSING: 35-year-old man, answers to the name ‘Nelly’. Last seen wearing a backwards cap and a T-shirt 5 sizes too big for him. If anyone has information leading to the safe return of Nelly, please call 0800-555-RECENTWORKDIDNOTMAKEANIMPACTINTHEUKCHARTS.

Then, while you wait anxiously for news, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 167:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

It’s not just Nelly missing. Where’s Wally? Where’s Waldo? Where’s Walter? It’s an epidemic of missing men… But not missing podcast-topics, which this week include:

electoral register unfairness
fake tan lines
John Krasinski
D-locks
Martin Handford
Lake Havasu City
TK Maxx vs. TJ Maxx
Walkers Crisps vs. the American War of Independence
the kingdom of Mercia vs. the kingdom of Wessex
Roger Federer vs. William Tell
Harry Potter vs. Queen Victoria
inappropriate poetry corner
massivesnouts.com
passive-aggressive chairs
Soulwax
the wrong London Bridge
the Ponte Vecchio
and
Mark Foster (whoooooo?).

Plus: Olly touches himself up – just in Photoshop, of course; Helen enjoys her own smutty courtroom drama; and Martin the Sound Man tells you what is cool – this is. So that’s 70s revival and spindly bridges on the style list for spring/summer 2011, OK?

This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iPhone or Android) is a question from Ken in Brooklyn about the pickelhaube, one of the few headgear-styles yet to be revived by hipsters. Give them a few more weeks.

Now rack your brains for QUESTIONS, then send them to us in voicemail form to the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or findanswermethis on Skype) or as emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Then we can weave more podcasts out of them. Score!

See you next week,

Helen & Olly

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Posted in PODCASTS | 11 Comments »

EPISODE 110 – too harmless to be sprayed on your enemy’s face

September 24, 2009

Hello, fellow lardbuckets,

Do you want to cut your calorie intake without having to reduce the amount of tasty and satisfying food you force down your gullet? This amazing new diet has nothing to do with acai berries, meal substitute shakes or laxatives. How? Find out all about Oliver Mann’s ‘Pacifies as it Satisfies’ regime for FREE by listening to Answer Me This! Episode 110:

This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

Don’t worry; if you already possess an untubby belly and bony thighs, there’s still stuff in this podcast for you. For instance:

Pimp My Ride
meteorological gender inequality
Cernunnos
Your Five Gallants by Thomas Middleton
puffa jackets
morning glory
The Magician’s Nephew
Rice Krispie cuboids
and
Hurricane Martin.

Furthermore, Olly is a silver-tongued devil for felines; Helen invents the worst party theme ever; and Martin the Sound Man says ‘lady’s vagina’ completely unnecessarily. You’re surprised, I can tell.

As ever, please indulge us with your QUESTIONS, which you can put to us via answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877.

Also, you can give everyone a treat by sharing your outstanding stag or hen party horror stories, because you know how we love to live vicariously and hate to get our own feet covered in sick. Stick them in a comment on this post, and maybe in a few years’ time someone will make them into a hilarious and squirm-inducing film.

See you next week!

Helen and Olly

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