It’s one of those fantasy questions that gets batted around when “Who would you want at your fantasy dinner party?” has been wrung dry: what would you spend the money on if you won the lottery? Except one questioneer has actually done it, and now they need to figure out what to spend the money on in a way that doesn’t tip anyone off that they won the lottery. What would you do? Tell us in the comments!
We also contemplate:
listener Rob’s 👆 amazing balloon art! Huey Lewis and the News Huey Lewis Choristers karaoke kissing trophies travelling with pole vault poles pretzel symbolism Biscoff spread toe socks and what to do with your late husband’s underpants.
Plus: Olly will not taking up hands-based hobbies, Helen talks about the not-good film Duets AGAIN (hear her discuss it on Pop This! podcast), and Martin the Sound Man could easily spend a lottery win on custom guitars.
Got questions for us? Send them in writing or voice note to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com – remember to include the formula “Helen and/or Olly, answer me this”, and let us know a name (pseudonyms are fine) and pronouns to use for you. Next episode will land in your podfeed 29 May 2025.
Become a patron at patreon.com/answermethis to help with the continuing existence of AMT, and to get an ad-free version of the episode, plus bonus material.What a great way to dispose of your lottery winnings, too!
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Helen‘s entertainment podcast about language, The Allusionist, returns in early May with a season about four-letter words; she and Martin are also doing live shows in Toronto on 1 June and Montréal on 9 June, get tickets via theallusionist.org/events.
The main reason is that TV ratings are not recorded for programmes under 15 minutes in length.
Therefore televising the draw on its own (which would take about two minutes) would not have any ratings attached.
Putting a terrible programme around it probably shows quite accurately how many people are tuning in for the draw itself, as who in their right mind would sit through half an hour of Dale Winton hosting a mind-numbingly boring quiz show…except maybe Olly?
And people who love balls, Chris; let’s not forget them.
Are you ready to get your stonk on? (Whatever that actually means.) Then listen to Answer Me This! Episode 315:
Today we deal with:
caffeine overdoses
the Lotto Drawmaster’s gloves
iPad infidelity alerts
soundchecks
Periscope
Hale and Pace
goatees
Van Dykes
imperials
and
nemeses.
Plus: Olly lies about his breakfast and reveals a surprising new phobia; Helen ruins some of your favourite songs; and Martin the Sound Man luckily has grown out of his Nu Metal phase.
Today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App (available for iThings, Android and Windows devices) is a question from Steffy in Bristol: ‘What is Swarovski crystal?’
For more additional listening, this is the podcast we mentioned about the consequences of soundchecking by asking interviewees ‘What did you have for breakfast?’ Makeuthink.
We’ll return on 11th June 2015 with AMT316, can you keep your stonk going until then?
Helen & Olly
••• AMT315 Child-Friendly Rating: 40%. Quite a few swears. Question about infidelity; not sexually graphic, but may compel your child to ask Awkward Questions. A lot of boner chat in the question about ‘stonk’, but not so much lewd as sobering in light of recent BBC revelations. •••
Of course, you’re already used to getting good advice from us. (Shut up!) But this week, we have some even better advice from broadcasting stalwart Paul Ross, which was instrumental in making Olly Mann the broadcasting stalwart he himself is today. Hear what it was here and here only, in Answer Me This! Episode 152:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
This week, we address subjects including:
90s collars
Benson & Hedges
The Saturdays
butterbear
Carr’s water biscuits
yuppie kids
evil spirits
Ciro Citterio
the Queen vs. Pixie Lott
Batman’s wedding
Hong Kong tailors
trangias
Terry’s Chocolate Lemons
ligatures
Warhorse
Ben Stiller’s workwear
the musical cleft
Luciano Pavarotti outstaying his welcome
ball-handlers
the Isle of Arran
and
&.
Furthermore: Olly is a staunch conservative when it comes to the appropriate composition of orange-flavoured foodstuffs; Helen’s innate scruffiness has dashed her telemarketing dreams; and Martin the Sound Man stands up for Tom Stoppard. Meanwhile, over on the app, Gaz from Jedburgh has a question about a problem we’re sure is common to a great many of you: nepotism in the forestry business.
Everyone who got a question answered in today’s episode needs to email us their postal address sharpish, so we can send along a free copy of the Answer Me This! book; everyone else needs to send us a QUESTION to be in with a chance to win a free book, along with an answer, of course. You know what to do: leave a voicemail on the Question Line 0208 123 5877 or Skype IDanswermethis, or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.