Changes are afoot as the approaches its TENTH BIRTHDAY next month. But it’s mostly business as usual in Answer Me This! Episode 345, to whit:
Bat Out Of Hell: The Musical the Angel of the North
cheese juice
getting Discovered for a glittering showbiz career
amateur theatre vs professional theatre
Orange Marys vs Filthy Martinis
Samantha Janus Womack
Boots the Chemist
Plato’s Symposium
the platonic ideal of being a bed
and
a cat called Anus.
Plus: Olly petitions for the musical role of a lifetime, or at the very least a guest spot when Song By Song podcast does a Jim Steinman season; Helen actually read some trade publications about steel for this episode, lest her commitment to AMT be in doubt; and Martin the Sound Man doing an impression of Olly’s cat Coco will one day be Exhibit A in Helen’s murder trial.
In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App – available for iPadPhones, Android and Windows devices – we take a trip to Winter Wonderland. Or rather winterwonderland.com, the perfect Christmas gift for only £500,000.
The perfect Christmas gift for only £2.49 is, of course, the AMT Christmas album – find out more about its contents at answermethispodcast.com/christmas, then tell Santa to buy it for you from the AMT store, iTunes or Amazon.
Thanks to our friends at Squarespace.com for sponsoring this episode, and for giving you 10% off their website-hosting and -designing services for a whole year if you use the discount code ‘answer‘. What a gift!
FREE festive fun for all the family is the Argos Game: we challenge you to find a product in the Argos catalogue that is more expensive than this £32,000 20ft swim tub (but be careful not to get too sexy in it, for your teeth’s sake).
BUT ALSO please send us affectionate voicemails – or email us voice memos – for our tenth birthday episode. Deadline is New Year’s Eve, and the episode, AMT346, will appear on 4 January 2017. Join us! Without you, we are nothing! Etc!
Helen & Olly
••• AMT345 Child-Friendly Rating: 40%. F-words R Us. •••
And, do not forget, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 249 as well:
Today we discuss:
tweed
Michael Jackson’s umbrella
chopsticks
Gaelic warlords
pipe-smoking
tax trends
The Fugitive vs. fairytales
Harold Wilson vs. Gandalf
lockers
the goddess Ériu
Toronto, Kansas
chopsticks
and
Rabbi Shmuley Boteach.
Plus: teenage Olly was the lovelorn Bard of txtspk; Helen is going to spend the AMTbreak in Scotland investigating The Mystery of the Missing Sweet and Sour Pork Balls; and Martin the Sound Man won’t sacrifice choice for convenience when it comes to the specific heat capaity of his toast toppings.
In this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android), we delve further into Chris from Lewes’s question about combining butter with other spreadable substances. Perhaps he’s just ahead of his time! Or perhaps he really is just unbelievably lazy.
You, however, ought not be so lazy that you fail to send us your QUESTIONS for the next series. Leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis; or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Give us something great with which to celebrate AMT250, because we can’t afford a marching band.
NO DON’T TELL US. Tell nobody. Find that impulse that lurks deep within yourself to vocalise your opinions upon a matter so boring, so mundane, so underwhelming an indicator of anything interesting about your character; find it, then destroy it.
Then listen to Answer Me This! Episode 248:
Today we ponder upon:
Flu Camp
pregnancy disguises
Stevenage slush puppies (not a euphemism)
Ming Dynasty toilet paper
Joseph Gayetty
posh Pot Noodles
domestic rubbish vs. commercial rubbish
London, UK vs. London, Ontario
figure skating vs. Dancing On Ice
Tiny Toronto
and Sergey Brin hiding in the bushes.
Plus: Olly’s lukewarm about Google Glass, but looking forward to the installation of his Google Womb; Helen believes the empire waist to be an offence to waists (and empires); and Martin the Sound Man doesn’t like the principles of Ayn Rand, he just looks like he does.
This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) is a question from Poppy wondering why Skittles’ latest ad campaign is targeting the people-who-eat-bodily-growths market. Cheer up, Poppy; at least they’re not suggesting you wipe your bottom with Skittles then tell them about it.
Tell us your QUESTIONS, though: email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis. Then treat yourself to a free Audible audiobook as a reward. OK, you can have one anyway, for being so well-behaved (and because we receive a bit of lovely money for each of you who has one; let’s not be coy about it).
Following bossy Paul‘s Toronto vs. Vancouver holiday destination question in AMT240, we’ve received quite a few defences of Toronto, several recommendations for Montreal, and very little regarding Vancouver. This suggests that Vancouverites either think Vancouver is not as good as Toronto and/or Montreal, or they’re so laid back they don’t feel the need to spring to the defence of their splendid hometown. And/or they like Vancouver so much they don’t want Paul in it.
Vancouverites, if you’re reading this, by all means go to the comments to clarify the reason for your silence. Meanwhile, the Torontonians have spoken up. Andrew from Toronto sums up the qualities of the cities:
I live in Toronto, but love to visit montreal. They are all very different cities. If I were your listener, I would go to Toronto (not boring Olly!), and take an overnight trip to montreal.
Toronto is: ancient streetcars; hilarious fired mayors; grubby, wonderful, diverse Kensington market; TV trucks smashed through walls; 3 hours from Algonquin and 5 hours from Montreal; Honest Ed’s; art festivals; delicious St Lawrence market; a “little” ethni-copia: Little India, Little Italy, Little Portugal, Little Chinatown, Chinatown, Greektown; Church Street; FOOD, so much good food (just stay away from the financial district and the distillery district for it); Burgers Priest.
Montreal is: authentic bagels; Celine Dion’s smoked meat; sour Francophones who pretend not to understand English, and won’t give directions to bakeries because they feel culturally oppressed; jazz festivals; beautiful old Montreal; corrupt corrupt politians, like, Chicago corrupt; tam tam.
Vancouver is: beautiful mountains; indecipherable highway system; Stanley Park; rainy; Battlestar Galactica; pot; ridiculously expensive real estate; Skid Row; relaxed; Vij’s.
There’s a Chinatown AND a Little Chinatown? I’m booking a two-week dim sum tour in the January sales.
Next, Dani presents a considered case:
I was born and raised in Toronto, but moved to Vancouver at 19 and lived there for four years.
While in general I’m inclined to agree with Olly that Vancouver is an overall ‘nicer’ place to visit than Toronto, remember that Paul was looking for an interesting cold-weather destination. Vancouver in the winter is probably not dissimilar to the UK, with generally cold but not below freezing temperatures, lots of drizzle, and weeks on end without sunlight. (After typing all this, I realize that he might be thinking of skiing/wintersports that one might enjoy in Whistler, etc. Of course there is that. I just tend to think of the city proper when I think Vancouver)
Toronto in the winter is plenty cold, but if you plan on staying in the middle of the city, you’ll find yourself in a sea of brown, salty slush. Many of the nicer things to do in Toronto (there are some beautiful parks and great shopping districts) would frankly be kind of a downer in the middle of winter (and this coming from someone who loves the city and considers it home.)
I think if he is set on a Canadian vacation in winter, Helen’s suggestion of Montreal would be a better option. And you’d have a chance to try some real poutine! (Shut it, it’s delicious, and vastly superior to Putin on pretty much every count.)
It’s true. Poutine is corrupted by curds and gravy, whilst Putin – well, it’s difficult even to know where to start.
Brace yourselves, listeners: in Answer Me This! Episode 240, those two titans of the Northern Hemisphere, Russia and Canada, face off for the bout you’ve all been waiting for. KABOOM!!!!
Sort of.
This week we speak of:
Andy Warhol’s wig
podcatchers
Russell Brand’s dad
penis pasta
Guinness World Record adjudicators
mean mean mother-in-law
pleasing your partner’s parents
the death of Borders
holidays with Paul Daniels
and
poutine vs. Putin.
Plus: you may be surprised to hear that Olly is a one-doughnut Mann; Helen’s ex-boyfriend moved the earth for her, literally; and Martin the Sound Man unleashes his inner Sarah Palin. Watch out, world.
This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) is a question from Sam about Gems TV, that 24/7 diamond of entertainment.
Next week is the first half of the Best of Answer Me This! 2012, but for your chance to appear in the Best of Answer Me This! 2013, send us QUESTIONS for the new year. Email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis.
Also please do try out our other weekly podcasting exploit The Joy of Tech from BBC 5 Live, in which we talk about the week’s internet events alongside experts in tech, cars, gaming and other highlights of modern existence.
Answer Me This! Podcast 