Archive for the ‘User-generated answers’ Category

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »

Après-bungee

May 14, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT313 •••

Here’s a question from Colm from London:

What happens after a bungee jump? You throw yourself off a bridge with an elastic band tied to your feet, then at the end you’re left down at the bottom, dangling. Does someone come and get you from there? Or are you slowly winched up back to the bridge? I’d find the latter much worse than the actual jump itself.

Readers, you’re going to have to jump into the comments to answer this question. None of us has ever done a bungee jump. Considering Olly managed to dislocate his shoulder walking to meet his ski instructor for his first lesson – not even from skiing itself! – if any of us attempted a bungee jump, it’s reasonable to assume that what would happen afterwards would involve an ambulance and months of physiotherapy.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 3 Comments »

Innards in a jar

April 28, 2015

BvBxVMC3yBrN-eiUK1niEXeVG05OMuLrccZkxrq7sngo5eXhsxqG-rR_38TvLblm32f3jmtPgThNCxUPFJoPZsSibvjXqvDfKNE5rUpZ9dZz7esONgiAAU55-F-pwPo9Vw

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT312 •••

Another medical question arrives from Courtney, 34, in Omaha, Nebraska:

I have been lucky enough never to need surgery, but if I do ever need to have my appendix, tonsils, or several inches of my intestines removed…

ANSWER ME THIS:

Would the surgeon allow me to take my innards, rather, my newly outtards, home with me in an alcohol-filled jar?

Medics and surgery-alumni, please go to the comments to supply Courtney with her answer.

I know that after I had my gallbladder removed, in my post-surgical party bag was a little plastic jar filled with gallstones, or a spoonful of gravel off the pavement, difficult to call.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 3 Comments »

plaster cast-offs

April 28, 2015

maxresdefault

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT312 •••

Alex in Doncaster writes:

Like most boys at a younger age I enjoyed such hobbies as climbing trees, making rope swings and generally running around. On occasions, this led to the odd injury including broken bones, which heal when placed in a plastic/fibre glass cast. Many years later it is a good thing that I haven’t been injured in a while but I do have a faint memory of having casts removed – this included the use a type of circular saw to cut through the plaster.

This seems a little over the top to me now, but obviously I would have just accepted it as a child. However, answer me this – did/do they use a circular saw to remove casts, or is it some kind of phantom memory my brain has created?

If I haven’t made it up then how can it be that this does not generally result in loss of limbs etc??? Maybe there is a safety device to stop this or maybe it relies on supreme skill from the people doing it (seems hugely unlikely!!)? Finally is there any documented time when this has gone horribly wrong??

Readers, I turn to you for the answer, as I am not somebody who has ever worn a plaster cast/removed a plaster cast/sliced off someone’s arm whilst trying to remove a plaster cast.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , , ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 3 Comments »

Magnum problem

April 15, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT311 •••

Jon in Taiwan is vexed by vexillology:

My brother in law and his family are going to Hawaii tomorrow. I want to just be happy for them but one question troubles me.

Answer me this: In Magnum PI, Magnum’s boss or buddy – I don’t remember which – is British and had a Union Jack flying at his office. Why??? I thought Hawaii is the USA?

I have never seen Magnum PI, so from that position of ignorance, and going only on the evidence supplied by Jon, I deduce that a Union Jack would be thus deployed as a shortcut to establish that the character is a big British Brit. Perhaps he also drinks tea, wears tweed golfing bags and says, “What what?”

To add to Jon’s confusion, the Hawaiian flag does incorporate the Union Jack:

HawaiiFlagPicture4

Most of all, I’m sad that this issue is interfering with Jon’s wish to be happy for his brother. Somebody, please step in and deliver the truth in the comments. A family’s contentment depends upon you.

PS Union Jack, ‘Union Flag’ – don’t even bother.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , , ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | Leave a Comment »

hairdressers’ hairy feet

April 15, 2015

 

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT311 •••

If there are any hairdressers, trichologists or mythbusters reading this, please go to the comments ASAP to answer this question from Hollie in Reading:

My boyfriend is adamant that hairdressers never wear flip flops because if they get cut hair on their feet it can attach itself and grow!

Is this true?

We have been arguing about it for 5 years and he is wearing me down. It sounds so ridiculous but he is certain and even got a hairdresser friend to tell me ‘the truth’ and she agreed with him! Is he right? Can hair attach itself to other people’s skin?

I would imagine that hair trimmings, particularly short ones, could stick like a splinter into a hairdresser’s foot, hence them choosing more protective footwear. But, just as a splinter in your foot won’t grow into a sapling, NO OF COURSE SOMEONE ELSE’S HAIR TRIMMINGS CANNOT TAKE ROOT AND GROW OUT OF A HAIRDRESSER’S FOOT.

I’m not a scientist, so maybe I’m wrong. But cut hair is dead, so surely I’m not.

Next question: if someone has particularly sweaty feet, could you grow cress inside their damp trainers?

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , , ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 10 Comments »

holiday buddies

April 14, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT311 •••

Anonymous Man finds himself with an unwanted travel companion:

I am a single gay man in his early thirties. As part of being a gentleman that enjoys the casual shag every now and again, I go get my bits checked in my local GUM clinic 2-3 times a year. Unfortunately, my most recent trip ended with me having a round of applause* in my throat.

I was given a jab in the bum and a several pills as a massive dose of antibiotics, and told to come back in two weeks to make sure all was well and good. However, it will be three weeks until this appointment as I am heading on holiday before then.

The was to be a somewhat sexy holiday, and thus my dilemma is this: should I abstain from sex, even though it is overwhelmingly likely (99.6%, by rough internet research) that I will be cured at this time? As someone that engages in semi-regular casual sex, I’m aware of the risks of having sex with a stranger (that all parties should take into account); in my case, the percentage wouldn’t be based on how adventurous I’d been but on the efficacy of treatment.

I try to be honest and up front (I have contacted all those who needed to know about this bout, in case they need to get themselves checked) about stuff like this, but I think this degree of honesty would probably make the question moot.

Thoughts?

*applause = the clap = gonorrhea – but I’m sure you figured out already.

Readers, what do you think? Would condoms not make this a non-problem even if he’s 0.4% uncured? Provide your medical and sexual advice in the comments.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , , ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 3 Comments »

humanising the human statues

March 17, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309 •••

Angela from Seattle writes:

I’m just catching up on a few episodes I missed.

Re AMT287, I see our well known painted statue gentleman walk through the neighborhood to catch the bus quite often. He is also regularly downtown at the bus stop and outside his post at Pike Place. Regularly in the rain with no running of his body paint. It astounds me.

When I see him walking past my house I always want to say hello and invite him in for a drink but alas, what is the protocol there? Answer me this: how does one go about convincing a living statue to come in and chat? (Is that creepy?! I am so curious about how and what he does outside of work.)

Readers, do you think there’s a romantic element to Angela’s interest in the human statue? Does she want to Pygmalion this situation?

Whether you do or not, head to the comments to suggest non-creepy ways for Angela to extend the hand of friendship – and also to discover the secrets of his stay-put make-up.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , ,
Posted in Answer Us Back! Your time to opine, extracurricular questions, retro feedback, User-generated answers | Leave a Comment »

Fifty Shades of Prank

March 17, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT309 •••

We love a good prank and we love a happy ending, so we double-love this correspondence from Richard in Finsbury Park:

In AMT303 you talked about my inappropriate prank on my elderly mum. I had put Fifty Shades of Grey on her Kindle with the names of the main characters changed to my mum and dad’s: Christine and Frank.

Well finally she has read the thing. I was worried she might go ape when she rumbled me. She didn’t. Look at the email she sent me. I think I have the best natured parent on the planet.

Well you little bugger, I have been making such a fool of myself as I thought that the characters in 50 Shades were really called Frank and Christine. It would never have occurred to me that the names throughout a whole book could be changed. This morning in the hairdressers I asked a lady who had read the trilogy why the names had changed in the second book. She said they hadn’t and when I said they were Frank and Christine, Lee said ‘I think someone has been having you on’. Then the penny dropped and everyone in the shop was in stitches. I don’t know how you did it and I had been telling people what a coincidence it was, how silly am I. Dad said, ‘Well, that is a typical Richardism,’ so now you can have a good laugh. Wait ’til you get here and you might find your flies sewn up or one leg off your trousers!

Mum

So answer me this: what can I do to wind her up next?

It’s surely her turn to prank you in return, isn’t it? But if you really want to risk a second round, perhaps some of the AMT squad have some cunning ideas. Readers, go to the comments and suggest a jape. I still think you’ll be hard pushed to beat Richard’s original prank, but I feel you’re up to the challenge.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , ,
Posted in Answer Us Back! Your time to opine, extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | Leave a Comment »

“Congratulations! To ME!”

March 3, 2015

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT308 •••

This questioneer asked to remain anonymous, but you’ll know who she is when she turns up wearing a 12-week scan as a fascinator:

We just found out we are having a baby, we want to tell people but you have to wait three months and in calculating when that is, it turns out it’s on our friend’s wedding day…

Answer me this… should we wait until after the wedding or do we do it then, will that be totally stealing thunder?

If I found that out on my wedding day (i.e. if it were the other way around) I would be really happy for them and I think it would add to the day. But obviously that’s me.

Even if it is not just you, Expectant Attention-Embezzler, the odds aren’t great that the newlyweds are eager for you to ‘add to the day’. But you know you don’t have to make your announcement bang on the three-month mark, right? It’s not like if you don’t tell people then, you can’t mention the child again until its 25th birthday.

Readers, what do you think? Tell people the day before? Tell people the day after? Or on the wedding day, stand around with one hand on your stomach and the other batting away glasses of champagne and let Dame Rumour do the rest of the work for you?

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 7 Comments »

Spotted: Ainsley Harriott

March 3, 2015

ainsley

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT308 •••

Since AMT306, it seems like we’re really doing this. We’re really sharing our Ainsley Harriott spots.

Today’s correspondent who has been Ainsley-blessed is Alistair:

I once met Ainsley Harriott in a Sainsburys checking out in front of me and a friend.

He saw us buying just vodka and coke and said, ‘Alright boys, looking to get some pussy tonight?’ It was uncomfortable.

Sounds it. Anyone else got an uncomfortable Close Encounter of the Harriott Kind to report? Let it out, let it all out. Now’s the time.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:,
Posted in Answer Us Back! Your time to opine, User-generated answers | Leave a Comment »

surprise celebs

February 18, 2015

1533-620x400

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT307 •••

Nathan from Manchester has written to share his various brushes with fame:

Back in 2001 I worked in a Levi’s store in central Manchester. Often celebrities would come in to buy overpriced jeans so I served Hollyoaks and Corrie actors, premiership footballers and even the drummer from Oasis. But I didn’t recognise any of them. It became a bit of a running joke with my colleagues as I would serve someone, then they would give me clues so I could work out who I had just talked to.

The one exception was Ainsley Harriott who was unmistakable, mostly because of his size. I had seen him on TV but was still surprised with how big he was. (He said Levi’s was the only place he could buy non-custom jeans from.) I got him some huge jeans and he also tried on some imported Levi shoes from America but even the one size 12 pair we had were too small for him.

Anyway, answer me this: have you ever interacted with a celeb or star without realising it at the time? And how did you find out about it afterwards?

I have, Nathan – also when I worked in a shop, in this case Hall’s Bookshop in my home town of Tunbridge Wells. One morning in the late 90s, I sold two old French paperbacks to a man who seemed quite tipsy even at that early hour, and refused to to take his 20p change. Then after he left, another customer rushed in to ask which books Tom Baker had bought. Having been too unborn/young to see him play Doctor Who from 1974 to 1981, I was oblivious.

(I just had a look on the new Hall’s website, and it appears Tom Baker is still frequenting the place!)

Readers, go to the comments to boast of your unwitting celebrity interactions.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, , ,
Posted in Answer Us Back! Your time to opine, User-generated answers | Leave a Comment »

Parlo Italiano

February 17, 2015

italian-gestures1

••• CLICK HERE TO CATCH UP ON AMT307 •••

A question about la bella lingua Italiana from Adam, aged 34 and 3/4:

I live in Gillingham in Dorset. I have recently taken a job that divides my time between England and northern Italy. I am just returning from my first week in Italy and I have had a throughly nice time. The people are very friendly, they all speak fantastic English and the job looks perfect for me.

Most of the time the Italians speak in English when I am there so I can join in with the banter around the coffee machine, butthere are other times where they speak in their mother tongue and I can’t understand a fucking word!! They could be mocking me and calling me a massive prick for all I know!?

Please answer me this: how do I learn Italian as quickly as possible? I don’t need to be fluent but enough Italian to be polite and understand at least what subject they are discussing and…so I know if they are calling me a wanker.

Readers, any suggestions? I’ve heard the Michel Thomas Method app is nothing short of miraculous, but I haven’t tried it yet, and also I don’t know how comprehensively it teaches you to recognise whether or not you’re being called a wanker.

• ALBUMS • CLASSIC EPISODES • BOOK • iTUNES • SOUNDCLOUD • FAQ •
iPHONE APP • ANDROID APP • FACEBOOK • TWITTER • YOUTUBE • MERCH

Tags:, ,
Posted in extracurricular questions, User-generated answers | 2 Comments »

« Older Entries
Newer Entries »