Posts Tagged ‘embarrassment’
June 16, 2011
Over the years, one question has kept us awake at night (other than, “Did I remember to turn the oven off?” and “How can the next-door neighbours like listening to Duffy this much?”): where do all the spurned Build-A-Bear bears go? Do they end up in a bear workhouse, or are they turned out onto the streets to survive by turning tricks and picking pockets?
Thankfully, no. After Answer Me This! Episode 179 we will, at last, be able to sleep the deep sleep borne out of the relief that the poor orphant bears do find a good home:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In today’s episode we also consider:
Co-op Funerals
doll hospitals
the mystery of Glenn Miller
McCain’s Pizza Rollers
office toys
cycle helmets
the most striking aspect of Jordan’n’Dane Bowers’ sex tape
reality TV vs. reality
Dame Bruce Forsyth
Chris Cooley’s cock (NSFW!)
Ruth Badger
the Black Eyed Peas’ next hit (shudder)
20p
Gwyneth Paltrow in Glee
symbolism in ET
and
toff prison.
Plus: Olly sees right through posh Findus Crispy Pancakes to the publicity stunt beneath; Helen surmises why seminal movie scenes such as this are not set in Business Studies lessons; and Martin the Sound Man pipes up in favour of hot goo. Yes, he does.
Please join us next week for episode 180, in which we will do a full 180 on everything we’ve ever said so far, apart from one thing which will remain forever true: we want you to send us your QUESTIONS, by leaving voicemails on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or find answermethis on Skype) or sending emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Gimme gimme gimme.
Helen & Olly
Tags:90210, Alan Sugar, Amstrad, Anthony Weiner, Balmoral, bears, Black Eyed Peas, boring, Britney, Bruce Forsyth, Brucie, Buffy, Build a Bear, business, cake, casting, cats, celebrity genitals, celebrity sex tapes, Cherie Blair, Chris Brown, classroom, Co-op, cock shots, collectibles, consumer rights, contraceptives, Cormac McCarthy, crime, criminals, Dane Bowers, darts, Dawson's Creek, desks, diaphragm, dissection, Dutch Cap, embarrassment, ET, Fergie, Fergie (not Fergie out of the Black Eyed Pes, film, Findus Crispy Pancakes, food, freebies, frozen food, Gaydar, gender divide, genitalia, Glee, Google, Gwyneth Paltrow, honours, honours list, Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, idiots, internet shopping, Jive Bunny, jobs, Jordan, judges, Kanye West, Katie Price, life imprisonment, Lindsay Lohan, Megan Fox, Michael Barrymore, monarchy, movie cliches, movies, MPs' expenses, music, naked photos, Newton's Cradle, nudity, ornaments, paint, palace, paper, paperweights, parents, penis, perks, perks of the job, pin image, prawn, prison, provocative behaviour, reality tv, retail, retro food, royals, Ruth Badger, Sarah Ferguson, Second World War, sex tapes, sexting, shame, shopping, Stacy Ferguson, Strictly Come Dancing, symbolism, telly, Tesco, the apprentice, the famous English reserve, the other one), the Queen, The Road, toe sex, toys, tv trickery, Twilight, upskirt, Will.I.Am, women vs men, World War Two, WWII
Posted in PODCASTS | 1 Comment »
March 24, 2011
Hello Team AMT,
The Secret Diary of Billie Piper concluded this week, so I guess it’s up to us to bring the sexy henceforth. So, bloated from too much Chinese takeaway, we belchingly waddle forth to present you with Answer Me This! Episode 172. Ring-a-ding-ding! Phwoar! Boinnnnngggg! Etc.
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Just like Billie’s character, we love variety; but instead of keeping ourselves amused with multiple hairstyles and myriad sexual partners, we merely talk a lot. About such diverse things as:
hiding the afikomen
the Giant Koala
Leonardo DiCaprio
offensive T-shirts
bad taste vs. good taste
After Eights vs. Ferrero Rocher
The Moldy Peaches
vs. The Secret History
vs. What Women Want
Ginger Spice vs. Scary Spice
moths vs. moobs
Stonehenge vs. the Easter Island moai
Digbeth Coach Station
Camden Market
the new Starbucks logo
Time Team alternative endings
Maria Teresa de Filippis
Slash in the Attic
and
the Jonathan Dimbleby octopus.
Plus: Olly’s habitual goodwill to all mankind finally shatters, all because of those godforsaken people with strong bladders; Helen reveals another fashion misfire from her youth (let’s face it, her youth was fashion misfire: 1000000, fashion fire: nil); and Martin the Sound Man gives Kylie Minogue the nod should she ever find herself in a dry spell. What an altruist that man is. This week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for the iPhone or Android, appfans) is an insight into what Olly’s wearing. It’s pink! It involves trompe l’oeil! No, he’s not wearing Buffalo Bill’s skin-suit from The Silence of the Lambs…
We warn you that next week’s podcast will be a few hours late, because Olly’s going for a spa mini-break. But he’ll be thinking about your QUESTIONS the whole time he’s steaming his mannparts, so do ask them via voicemail on the Question Line (dial 0208 123 5877 or find answermethis on Skype) or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Then after you’ve done that, anoint yourself in unguents, wrap yourself in a bathrobe which has been worn by hundreds of people before you, lie back and relax.
See you next week!
Helen & Olly
Tags:After Eights, after-dinner mints, ancient monuments, archaeology, auctions, australia, beer, Belgium, beverages, booze, branding, Britney Spears, bus, Camden, cars, celebrities, celebrity portraits, chauvinism, chocolates, coach, confectionery, crap art, Cyprus, David Bowie, dinner parties, drinks, Easter Island, eBay, embarrassment, euphemisms, evil spirits, expressions, fairground rides, fairgrounds, fashion, Formula 1, Friends, friendship, furniture, gay culture, gay icons, Geri Halliwell, homosexuality, hygiene, inappropriate, innuendo, Japan, Jon Bon Jovi, Jonah, Judaism, junk, Kylie, Kylie Minogue, landlords, landmarks, logos, maritime, matzo, Mel B, milk, mints, myth, mythical beasts, naval, Pacific, Passover, pastimes, pirates, pop, portraiture, racing, rental properties, rides, rubbish, sailors, Samurai swords, Sarah Palin, sartoria, sea, sea-devil, sell-by dates, sex, sexism, shame, ships, sights, skip-diving, skips, slang, sophistication, Spice Girls, sport, Starbucks, Stonehenge, sword, Sylvester Stallone, t-shirts, tastelessness, teenagers, tests of friendship, things that seemed a good idea at the time, tourism, tourist attractions, travel, unwanted company, waste, weapons, women
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »
October 21, 2010
Greetings!
To follow the mood of this week, we must announce that we’ve decided to cut Answer Me This! Episode 153 by eight per cent. However we reassure you that we will be freezing the length of this episode at 27 minutes 37 seconds for the next two years, or until the apocalypse, whichever is sooner. Here you go:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Today’s time-of-austerity topics include:
non-alcoholic beer
Jim Henson’s fake rats
shadduck
Michael Apted
Lidl
Johnny Depp vs. Danny Dyer
Center Stage
Olly’s favourite condoms (surprisingly not these ones)
The Witches
Stephen Jones, milliner
isopropanol
Rowan Atkinson’s ‘early’ work
Bonnie Prince Billy’s hometown
Nicolas Roeg
identical twins
Michael Palin in drag
and
losing your virginity to a chair.
Plus: Olly has been repelled from his favourite snack by Gok Wan; Helen suggests a high school Joseph Mengele; and Martin the Sound Man plays off Gene Wilder and Spike Milligan against each other. WHO WILL WIN? We will, alas, never know.
What we do know is that next week is the last episode in which we’ll be handing out free books to questioneers, so send us your most brilliant QUESTIONS right now! Leave a voicemail on the Question Line 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, or email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, to which you should send your postal address if you are one of this week’s featured questioneers and want to claim your freebie.
If you want to claim your not-quite-free-but-really-not-too-pricey copy of Answer Me This!: Collected Juvenilia, then investigate answermethispodcast.com/book, whereat you will find not only links to a few online bookshops, but also some sample pages to induce you to preorder itmake you decide to order Booky Wook 2 instead.
Helen and Olly
PS Forgot to mention: this week’s bonus bit on the app is Olly’s account of his recent debut trip to a branch of Hooters. It was all in the name of post-feminist irony, alright?
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Tags:7-Up, Activia, adoption, Anjelica Huston, bananas, beef, Bette Davis, Bitty McLean, booze, branding, car crash, cereal, chairs, Cher, Cilla daiquiri, citrus, clowns, comedy, condoms, contraceptives, Elliott Smith, embarrassment, family, film adaptations, fluids, food, fruit, furniture, gay, Gok Wan, grapefruit, grapes, homosexuality, hygiene, hymens, inebriation, josie long, marketing, melon, Miami Seaquarium, mice, movies, Nicholas Hytner, orange, Oxo, parents, pink, pratfalls, rats, Roald Dahl, selling out, sex, sexism, shame, siblings, slapstick, Snackajacks, soft drinks, Special K, telly, Tim Burton, twins, virginity, yoghurt, yuk
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September 2, 2010
Welcome to September, fellows; and right there along with that back-to-school feeling, blackberries and the looming return of Strictly Come Dancing, is Answer Me This! Episode 148:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In which we consider:
serving suggestions
Kris Marshall’s erection
hot nuts
booze calories
Andrew Lansley
Panini sticker distribution
Ruddles
overripe Bounty Bars
dodgems vs. bumper cars
natural light vs. unnatural flickery light
Olly’s grandma vs. black chandeliers
Britain’s Most Wanted Man
salted slugs
and
Amanda Seyfried’s jugs
Furthermore, Olly suggests that Brutus might not have been a murderer but a midwife; Helen wishes death upon the loathsome Adam’n’Jane; and Martin the Sound Man explains the hydrodynamics of a log flume. See? Science CAN be fun!
Over on the app, we deal with a question from David about how cavemen cut umbilical cords. Although Olly doesn’t deal that well, thanks to his curious belly button phobia. Was he flogged with a dessicated placenta as a young boy? The mystery persists…
Now don’t forget to net yourself some free audioliterature courtesy of Audible.co.uk – click here to find out about their splendid offers for AMTfans, and we can all revel in their largesse together. Then, you might send us a QUESTION, in the form of a voice message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis, or an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Then we’ll all be happy, hiphiphip hooray!
See you next week; and we might be seeing Ian Collins as well. Who knows? Tune in to Episode 149 to find out!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:advertising, birth, booze, Brussels, BT, Caesar, Caesarian, calories, Chloe, clocks, clothes, coconut, coffee, confectionery, Countdown, cowardice, crapness, drink, embarrassment, feminism, films, food, genitalia, grandmothers, grandparents, history, ingredients, Mamma Mia, marketing, pineapple, regulations, rules, slug genitalia, slugs, telly, theme parks, trousers, women's lib
Posted in PODCASTS | 7 Comments »
July 29, 2010
Hello listeners,
Thanks for sticking with us, considering that, as one of you has pointed out, Vanity Fair is encroaching on our turf. As is National Rail Enquiries! You can ask their question-bot anything, but she is far too judgemental in her responses. So we’re continuing regular service for now (unlike the East Coast Main Line, ber-boom), with Answer Me This! Episode 143:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
Today we speak of:
casual voyeurism
John Mayer vs. Stevie Ray Vaughan
AMT party vs. Elton John
spermaceti
moisturisers for men
English Heritage
John P. Charlton
Mr T in pieces
aloe vera
saucy postcards
Camille Pissarro
whaling
fake blue plaques
Boris Karloff’s bedroom
and
Buddhists’ favourite film (NB it’s not Multiplicity).
Plus: Olly reluctantly glows; Helen’s bitesize history revision is for far too big a mouth; and Harry Potter almost prevented Martin the Sound Man from achieving his doctorate. You think Voldemort’s a bastard? You do not want to get in the way of Martin with four years’ hard quantum physics in his hands. Thwarted on the very brink of escape, the man’s wrath could melt trees.
We also reminisce about the public humiliation which attended almost every step of Great British Questions Episode Two: Film, which you can see HERE. Meanwhile, over on the app, this week’s bonus noise concerns how we’d use our spare time if trapped in a Groundhog Day-style situation (clue: heroin, and serial killing).
Videos and apps notwithstanding, we still want your QUESTIONS. So please sate us with a voice message on 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis or an email to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com.
See you next Thursday for Episode 144, and on the preceding Tuesday for Episode Three of Great British Questions, in which we get all romantical. It’s ACTING, alright? Bleugh! The very idea.
Love, but only in a formal and platonic way,
Helen and Olly
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Tags:A Team, Andie MacDowell, Apple, aquatic mammals, armies, Batmobile, Bill Murray, bitches, Cars of the Stars, death, decapitation, Edinburgh, eggs, embarrassment, English literature, food, grooming, Groundhog Day, Harold Ramis, Harry Potter, history, holiday, jeans, ladies' undergarments, Lake District, Laurence Olivier, manners, Mary Poppins, military, moisturiser, olly's face, Oscars, Oxford, pharmaceuticals, postcards, pride, problems of the rich, product names, public humiliation, revolution, Russia, safari, San Francisco, skincare, soldiers, sperm, sperm whale, St Paul's, Steve Jobs, students, tamagotchi, tertiary education, toast, Trainspotting, Tuscany, USA, vacation, Vanity Fair, WB Yeats, whoops!, Worthing
Posted in PODCASTS | 7 Comments »
January 28, 2010
Yaaaaaaaaawwwnn!!!
Forgive us, but we’re all tired out at the end of this series of Answer Me This! – it’s been our longest one so far! And while we’re off on our anecdote-gathering trips in February, we want you to do a little something for us. Something fun and exciting. Find out what in Episode 124:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p at the Answer Me This! Store, through a secure server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
On the agenda today are:
the cockblocking face of Gareth Gates
True Blood
SOHCAHTOA
Fatal Attraction
cuddling vs. cortisol
Mitchell’n’Webb
nudie pics
mad actors
The Reader
the sexy Saw ride
and
Aslan.
Plus: Olly takes umbrage with ancient Canadian traditions; Helen totally fails the 1990s Culture module at the University of Life; and Martin the Sound Man doesn’t want to see any of those nasty films with boffing in them, OK? So stop sending him copies of Nine Songs in the post!
Now, it’s with great solemnity that we bid adieu to you until 4th March – but make sure we come back with a bang by supplying us with YOUR QUESTIONS, via answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877. We look forward to hearing from you, and hopefully you will look forward to hearing from us. You might also be looking forward to hearing a free Audible audiobook, which you can get HERE. That should obliterate a few hours of silence while we’re off air, no?
Please treat yourselves nicely during February, and we’ll see you right back here before you know it!
Helen and Olly
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Tags:adoption, bigamy, celebrity, dentistry, dilemmas, embarrassment, etiquette, hugs, hygiene, Julia Roberts, love, marriage, mental health, money, movies, names, Olly's cat, opera, parents, prawn, psychos, relationships, restaurants, Richard Gere, romance, royalty, sex, teeth, True Blood, Up, USA
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June 4, 2009
Listeners, we’re afraid that the day has come: it’s the last episode of the series! We’re sure you can cope; you seem like an emotionally sturdy bunch. And if our absence does prove too hard to bear, check out Episodes 1-40 for another 15+ hours of our company. Or, alternatively, our Early Learning Curve will make you miss us a lot less.
Anyway, on with today’s show, which is of course Episode 98:
This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)
In which there are:
party whistles
big bands
pot pourri
Ben Folds
‘Happy Birthday’
oestrogen
the Nottingham Eye
glottal stops
Michelle Pfeiffer
TGI Friday
cat grass
and
The Ivy festivity FAIL.
Plus: in trying out the kind of etymological web-research that Helen usually does, Olly finds himself in a whole world of Rude; Helen gives some surefire tips to repel potential flatmates; and Martin the Sound Man generally behaves himself, probably distracted by the fact that he has a new live EP out and you lovely chaps can download it for FREE from thesoundoftheladies.com/music
This being Episode 98, I’m sure the mathematical among you have clocked that our 100th episode is fast approaching. Naturally, we will not be letting our passage into triple figures go unmarked, and at the end of the episode we reveal how we’re celebrating it. Our Facebook Fanclub alone will be privy to how you too can be with us for the party of the century day, so join it stat!
Other than that, please do stay in touch while we’re away by sending us your QUESTIONS for the next series: call 0208 123 5877, Skype answermethis or email answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. And even though we’re giving our voices a rest, we’ll still be putting bits and bobs up on this website throughout our break, so do come visit; and we’ll see you back here on July 9th for Episode 99!
Love,
Helen and Olly
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Tags:appendix, Arabic, B&Q, birthdays, cats, Catwoman, cohabitation, diets, DIY, embarrassment, emergency surgery, etiquette, exes, household, Kristin Hersh, pets, petty grievances, prolapse, Scarborough, sex, TGI Fridays, tourist traps, university
Posted in PODCASTS | 2 Comments »
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