Answer Me This! Podcast

How do you tell your mum that she is a STUPID WOMAN who is RUINING CHRISTMAS by buying you the WRONG GIFT? Plus other polite and classy problems compose Answer Me This! Episode 328, in which we contemplate:

NaNoWriMo
sexist succession
breaking into your own house
vinegar vs menstruation
the novels of Katie Price
the novels of Ben Elton
pregnant Virgin Mary paintings
snooping on your Christmas presents
procrastination
the big piece of paper of Jack Kerouac
the little piece of paper in a box of chocolates
and
vinegar mother.

Plus: Olly plans never to get married, but maybe he’ll change his mind purely to have the themed wedding of his Jennifer Connelly-starring dreams; Helen turns her profound laziness into creative tips; and Martin the Sound Man puts the beats into his favourite Christmas carol.

In today’s Bonus Bit of Crap on the App, available for iThings, Android and Windows devices, Olly reveals the surprise hair inspiration of his mid-1980s barnet: Princess Diana.

Feeling festive yet? Click here to read about and then buy the Answer Me This! Christmas album; and click here to get the delightful Christmas podcasts from today’s sponsor Dobbies Garden Centres – and there’re plenty of Christmas tips and decorations to buy at dobbies.com and in store.

What have you got in store for us? Questions, we hope! Leave voicemails on the Question Line – call 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis – and send emails to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com. Befriend us online at facebook.com/answermethis and twitter.com/HelenAndOlly.

We’ll return on 10th December 2015 with AMT329.

Helen & Olly

••• AMT328 Child-Friendly Rating: 60%. No bawdy content, but there are a few swears, and the possible demystification of the machinations behind Christmas presents IF YOU KNOW WHAT WE MEAN. •••

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Tags: art, authors, Baby Jesus, Ben Elton, Bernard Cribbins, Bible, bodily fluids, book reviews, books, box of chocolates, Camilla Parker-Bowles, candy, Carrie, Catholicism, chocolates, Christmas, Christmas presents, Columbo, confectionery, creative exercises, David Bowie, deadlines, Dobbies, Dostoyevsky, Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, drugs, editing, Fahrenheit 451, family, fiction, folk remedies, Frankenstein, ghostwriters, ghostwritten, gifts, Gospels, Harry Potter, health, home security, Ian Botham, Ian McKellen, immaculate conception, Italian, Italy, Jack Kerouac, Jade Goody, Jennifer Connelly, Jilly Cooper, Jordan, Katie Price, keys, Knights Templar, Labyrinth, like it, literature, Little Donkey, locks, locksmith, Lord Byron, lump it, Madonna, Mary, Mary Shelley, medical, medical research, menstruation, monarchy, mum, NaNoWriMo, novelists, novels, On The Road, owls, paintings, parents, periods, photos, Piero della Francesca, pregnancy, pregnant women, presents, Prince Charles, Prince Philip, Princess Michael of Kent, procrastinating, procrastination, Queen Elizabeth II, Quidditch, red cups, reindeer, religion, reproductive health, Robert Louis Stevenson, royalty, scientific research, sexism, slippers, snooping, Starbucks, Stephen King, succession, sweets, The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas, The Gambler, The Naked Lunch, the Queen, The Running Man, themed weddings, Tuscany, Twin Peaks, veggie weddings, vinegar, Virgin Mary, wedding gimmicks, weddings, William S Burroughs, women, women's health, writing, Xmas

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