a cheese in the hand




Remember the AMT303 question about an online dater seeking handjobs with cheese, and the feedback in AMT304 about the notorious aficionado of such, the Swiss Cheese Pervert?

Well, even if you don’t, the above paragraph probably filled in the blanks.

Kate from Pennsylvania has further news of such:

I was amazed that the local story of the legendary Cheese Pervert reached across the pond when Liz in Brooklyn asked how a cheese hand job would be performed. It seems this man cast a wide net on dating sites, as one of my best friends told me the same story about five years ago.

It turns out that the man in question grew quite desperate and was arrested in Philadelphia for, well, “presenting” himself to women with cheese in hand. The story made the local news, and it turns out that I actually have several friends who received similar messages, and there is a definitive answer to the question from the man himself.

Liz was correct, and his preference is slices of Swiss cheese.

Here’s an article that includes one of his dating site messages, with a link to his subsequent arrest.

Thanks for the confirmation, Kate, that the correct medium for the cheesy hand job is sliced Swiss cheese. It would be terribly embarrassing for our listeners if they greeted their online assignation with a Mini Babybel or luscious Vacherin. What a boner-killer.


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