FEAST YOUR EYES.
What a surprise the publishers of our book decided not to use this picture! Granted, their usual style of authorial portrait is usually a little more contemplative, a tad more restrained. But they probably thought that to print an image of such timeless, exquisite beauty on the cover of our book would be unfair on all the other books.
Yes. That must have been the reasoning.
To find out why we have unleashed this aesthetics gamechanger, listen to Answer Me This! Episode 247:
Today we discuss:
forked tongues
Liv Tyler’s tits
holiday snaps
smoking vs. self-pleasuring
Pot Noodles vs. aquariums
Armageddon vs. Les Miserables
menageries vs. mono-nageries
corgis’ Christmas
Lion Tower
Bruce Willis in a space suit
and
bedroom antics.
Plus: Olly reveals how the Queen helped Kate and Willsher dogs to mate; Helen’s holiday photo albums all look like this; and Martin the Sound Man ejaculates through his tear ducts, apparently.
As an extension of the final questioneer’s bath masturbation query, this week’s Bit of Crap on the App (available for iDevices and Android) considers what else you can do in a bath, if said bath is in Las Vegas. Clue: cleanliness is unlikely to be the most immediate concern.
Our immediate concern is, of course, gathering your QUESTIONS: email them to answermethispodcast@googlemail.com or leave voicemails on the Question Line by calling 0208 123 5877 or Skype ID answermethis.
Pre-finally, do remember to check out Neil Denny interviewing us on Little Atoms podcast. Finally, get yourself a free Audible audiobook now!
Post-finally, farewell until next Thursday,
Helen & Olly
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Tags: abbreviations, accusation, action, Andrew Neil, animals, Anne Hathaway, annoying habits, arguments, aristocrats, Armageddon, asteroids, Audible, audiobooks, Austria, bad news, barely counts as food, baths, beasts, Ben Affleck, big cats, Billy Bob Thornton, boyf, Brett Ratner, Bruce Willis, Buckingham Palace, character flaws, Christmas, Christmas stockings, corgis, costumes, dangerous animals, deceit, dog breeding, dog breeds, dogs, dorgis, embarrassing bodies, etymology, films, flavour, food, Friends, garden gnomes, gender roles, gifts, good news, holiday snaps, horsemeat scandal, idiocy, insecurities, insecurity, Jerry Bruckheimer, killer whales, kissing, leopards, Les Miserables, lies, lions, Liv Tyler, London Zoo, lying, masturbation, matchmaking, memes, menageries, Michael Bay, monarchy, movies, Nasa, news, News Corp, noodles, onanism, Oscars, pets, phallic objects, photography, photos, Posh, Pot Noodles, presents, Queen Elizabeth I, Queen Elizabeth II, rebellion, relationships, Robert Evans, rows, royal family, royals, Rupert Murdoch, Sea World, secrets, self-pleasure, sex, sexism, shit films, smoking ban, space, space suits, Steve Buscemi, supersizing, surgery, swill, The Kid Stays In The Picture, the Queen, tongues, Tower of London, travel, travelling, urine, vacation, Vienna, Wales, wanking, wealth, wedding gifts, wedding presents, Welsh, white lies, yuk, zoos
Answer Me This! Podcast 
April 4, 2013 at 7:02 pm |
My memory may be failing me, but I can’t recall hearing that jingle @ 25:35 before… Very catchy. Good job whoever made that!
April 4, 2013 at 7:46 pm |
That fab jingle is by a listener called Kirk! Also available in episodes 191, 216, 227, 239 (not from memory; I have a jingles spreadsheet)
April 4, 2013 at 11:45 pm |
Right… That’s sad memory goes away first with age….
I wonder whether I enjoyed it previously as much as I did today… #senile #slightlyBehindWithListeningToo
April 5, 2013 at 9:31 am
That’s why I’m transferring all my memories to spreadsheets. Goodbye brain!
February 28, 2013 at 11:31 pm |
I love Pot Noodles, I have usually at least one a week 😀 I know they’re not exactly fine dining but they don’t seem to be too unhealthy and taste really nice. Because they fill you up such a small amount, always get Kingsize Noodles.
February 26, 2013 at 6:39 am |
I find Cup Noodles fairly good, actually. I sometimes makes a dinner out of it with a sandwich. Poverty!
February 25, 2013 at 1:57 am |
I used to eat those in Japan. My favourite one had a sachet of mayonnaise in it that you put on top, it was disgusting, the portion size was so big. And it cost less than a pound. I usually got terribly sick afterwards but I kept going back to it– Perhaps there is some suspicious addictive substance laid in among all the other suspicious substances. Why do people continue to smoke even when they know it’s bad for them? I think the same of the pot noodle.
February 21, 2013 at 5:53 pm |
Pot Noodle is just a UK version of a Japanese product that has spread all over the world, usually as Cup Noodles. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cup_Noodles