Captain Hook


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Watch your step with this email from Sam from Preston:

ive attached a photocopy of the X-ray I had done yesterday after I managed to fall over and stand on a bag of wool and get a crochet hook rammed into my heel.

that's gotta hurt

Eurgh! All my crafting accidents have been the result of reckless scissor-handling or freehand scalpel-work; I never realised a wealth of danger lurked at the head of a crochet hook. Sam continues:

Please answer me this: what’s the stupidest/most embarrassing thing you have done that required medical treatment?

I think we’re all familiar with Olly’s not-even-doing-any-skiing skiing accident (if not, revise AMT173). Everyone else may go to the comments and tell us of their own non-fatal stupid accidents, because it’s entirely fine to exploit other people’s pain for our entertainment.

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7 Responses to “Captain Hook”

  1. conorpc Says:

    When I was 5 me and my older cousin decided to race down the hall of my house. She was directly in front of the kitchen door to finish and I would finish just beside the wall. We started racing and I looked towards her and then, BAM! straight into the wall!! very sore I also had a similar expierence with the edge of a window sill and my fore head.

  2. Charlie the Wanghouse Says:

    I’ve grabbed a couple of electric fences, shoved a fork in a toaster and broken bones.
    My brother was practising stone skimming across a river, when he decided that he could skim further if he aimed downstream. I was standing downstream of him. He got me just above and to the right of my right eye.
    The most painful thing I’ve ever done happened when I was five. I fell over backwards and scraped the left side of my head against the corner of a square, metal tableleg. My ear was cut in half and blood spurted everywhere. It healed rather well, but I’ve still got a little nick missing from my ear.

  3. Phil from Treorchy Says:

    I once checked the wires in a faulty plug, but convinced I may need to change the fuse or something else, I decided to save time by not putting the protective cover back on it when I plugged it into the mains. My hand was touching a few exposed bits of metal and I got flung a couple of feet across my front room (I never realised that actually happened). I had 2 small burn marks (that looked like pin-heads) on the palm of my hand for over a year.

  4. Greg Says:

    Working at my college campus during the summer, I had a job where we needed to clear out some construction debris from a 3rd story dorm room. My fellow workers and I decided that this process would be facilitated by throwing the debris directly out the window. As a safety measure, I volunteered to go down to the ground and keep people away from the danger. As stuff started flying out the window, I thought it would be funny to dart underneath and dodge like some primitive video game character. (I know, a Darwin Award in the making). Eventually, inevitably, I got hit by something and needed a few stitches.

  5. Catherine Says:

    Oh my god. OH MY GOD!

  6. Erica Says:

    Quite a clumsy child, I have sat on an iron (ouch), thrown a stone straight into my brother’s face (I was practicing skimming stones), and burnt my leg pretending to drive my Dad’s motorbike. However most dramatic one was when when I walked into our stone mantelpiece at eye height. I had a red mark like a bindi between my eyes for the next year.

  7. scorpiusdiamond Says:

    When I was about 5 years old, having just come back from a school disco – and obviously dizzy off all the excitement – I decided it would be a fun idea to start throwing a rock I found in the garden up in the air like a ball and catching it. Inevitably after a couple of throws I misjudged my aim and the rock hit me in the back of the head. My parents took me to the nearest hospital where they put ‘glue’ in my head (or this was what they told me as a five year old). I also managed to almost pierce my own ear around the same age with an errant paper clip from a pirate’s hat.
    Ed, 19 (older, yet not necessarily wiser, but we can hope), Cardiff

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