EPISODE 118 – from Busted to Bulgakov

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Look, we know that ALL of you are in too great a tizzy about the impending release of the new Twilight film to concentrate on Answer Me This! Episode 118, but try. Just for us. Even though we’re not all sparkly and bouffant:


This classic episode is available to BUY NOW for just 79p, through iTunes or a secure PayPal server, without DRM restriction. CLICK HERE to find out more and support our podcast. (This helps keep our most recent episodes free)

This week we speak of:

Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey
Smeg fridges
the True Blood theme tune
Helen’s dad vs. Peter Pan
the colour of Jesus
Lois Duncan
stupid terrorists
Dermot O’Leary
Red Dwarf
and
fun things to do in Birmingham (UK, not Alabama).

Additionally, Olly dreams of walking through a sewer with Dan Ackroyd and a Ninja Turtle; Helen swoons over a Come Dine With Me contestant who seems to have OCD and too few hobbies; and Martin the Sound Man brings up The Master and Margarita as casually as Helen’s baby nephew brings up his lunch. Just in case you were wondering, he is THE CLEVEREST MAN IN THE WORLD. Try to forget it. He won’t let you.

Please, as ever, send in YOUR QUESTIONS – via answermethispodcast@googlemail.com, Skype ID answermethis or the question line 0208 123 5877 – and if you want to tell us about your funny or far-fetched nickname like Smeg did this week, please do so in a comment upon this post. But it has to be a good one, OK? “My name’s David but my friends call me Dave” will not cut it! You’re competing against an adult man named Smeg, remember.

See you next week!

Helen and Olly

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25 Responses to “EPISODE 118 – from Busted to Bulgakov”

  1. Nicole Says:

    During a slow afternoon in college last year my friends and I were discussing embarrassing childhood stories. Stupidly i happened to tell them about my extremely bad record with pets, as every pet i had before i was 10 i had accidently killed or had died within a year of me having them, including two fish, 2 hamsters, a parrot and a rabbit. After being asked by my friends how my rabbit had died, I proceeded to tell them the story of how i had been playing with the rabbit in the garden and after chasing it round and round for hours it ran under a hedge and died, my friends all burst into laughter and i was immediately nicknamed ‘Thumper’ and referred to as ‘The Bunny Boiler’. Unfortunately i still haven’t been able to shake off this horrible reference to the unfortunate demise of my beloved pet.

    Our friend Rhian also adopted the nickname ‘Fishy’ after a hilarious incident in a restaurant in Turkey this summer (this has nothing to do with pets, its exactly as bad as it sounds!)

    Our friend Edd is also lovingly referred to by us as ‘Gay Eddie’ which isn’t particurly funny to anyone else but is a reference to the Ed Bryne stand up as we are all stand up comedy freaks!

  2. ian Says:

    what’s crappenin’ redcoats? my name is ian and i’m from sunny southwest florida. my primary nickname in my family is “indougger.” this came about because my mother liked a soap opera star named ian and my dad was willing to go along with it due to ian anderson being in jethro tull. (isn’t he the flute player? i don’t want to believe i was named after a flutist) my grandfather is from missouri and he talks with the traditional missouri accent like nelly, with the rolling double Rs.(hot in herre is an example) he couldn’t pronounce ian( E-N) for some reason that i don’t understand so he just rushed the given and middle names together into something he could manage. in high school i ended up sharing the nickname codge with one of my close friends. how we both got this unusual nickname is lost to the ages, although he was mostly called arone codge and i was known as erone codge. eventually we were both just codge. i love you podcast but why do you call the letter “z” zed? should i start? and is gunge slime? i’ve wondered since you told the story of the schoolboys peeing into the gunge water buckets. or is it something else, something far more sinsiter?

  3. Queen sylvie Says:

    I get called sleeve. there is not a single thing i can seem to do about it. my actual name being sylvie, a rather hungover friend once called me sveel. naturally, this evolved to sleeve. well, as naturally as you can expect from a headache-ridden 14 year old high on caffeine, desperately trying to avoid any situation where they may be forced to either walk in a straight line or keep a single train of thought going for more than 3 minutes. Sadly, i have now become accustomed to the name and am more likely to answer to sleeve than my real name.
    Now, all that I can possibly to do to retain the last shreds of dignity is to come up with an equally odd name for her. She is Hannah. Any suggestions, oh you wonderful gods of podcasting?
    Love the show. Keep it up
    xx

  4. Kate BT Says:

    Two of my friends have nicknames that they are known by. I met them both when working at HMV during my gap year, and they were introduced as Grundy and Axl. They even had these names on their name badges, so that’s what they are known as to customers, colleagues and friends alike. I have never called either of them by their real names, which are Andrew Smith and Paul Askew respectively. I’m fairly sure the reasons for these nicknames were explained to me at some point, but I can’t remember them.

  5. Steve Says:

    During pre-pubescence I was taunted with “Harvey’s Festival”, “Harvey’s Crunch Bar”, “Combine Harveys-ter”, genius knicknames -thought up by equally genius council estate offspring with which to derail my youthful cool.

    As a teen, the name was shortened to just “combine”, which was ok as names go, nothing sinister, but scarred from the events of so many years thinking I was a corn thresher, I dished out a lot of nicknames myself, “Stinky-fucking-Amos”, “sausage”, “the chicken-pie piss bros.”, “Katie Syphilis”, “Stiffer”, “Gary white socks”, “Big Kirsty numbers 2’s”, “Big fun”, “Scratch n’ sniff” – the list goes on and on, however, the pinnacle of my name calling achievments came when I renamed a classmate “Aids victim”…

    Is aids funny yet?

  6. Charlie the Wanghouse Says:

    My grandad used to call me charlton athletic

  7. Daniel Says:

    I’m not sure what other people make of it, but my friends call me Nervous, because apparently though I thought I was quite confident when I first met them, I had a very nervous disposition.

    Come to think of it, that’s not interesting at all. Bugger.

  8. Tobster (Oby One) Says:

    At uni we had a mate call Bambi. Nothin to do with the film / cartoon but because he was slighly shorter that any of us. We all had nicknames of some sort, mine was smply my surname – not very origial! but his stuck. it got to a point where no-one could remember his real name and his other friends would be talking about him and we would be thnking it was another person. It got so bad that we met his parents and one of the guys called them Mr and Mrs Bambi infront of them.

  9. Jen Says:

    For some reason that I now can’t remember, my friend and I decided one day to give each other nicknames. She was thenceforth referred to as Mundle, while I received the less favourable moniker, Buttmunch (we were greatly influenced by Beavis and Butthead). I’ve never been particularly enamoured of this name, but a recent google search on Mundle has given me reason to smile and be thankful that I received the better of the two. According to Urban Dictionary, Mundle refers to a person who both supports Hitler and picks up Fat computer technicians.

  10. adam Says:

    I have a nickname that has been passed down to me, by my dad and his dad before him. My last name is Bates. Which was just normal to me until about the age of 11, when some twat at school said “Hang on, do you get mail that says Master Bates?”. For the next 5 or 6 years that was all I was called. “Hi there Master Bates” or “hey Master”. Now i live in canada, and they love calling me that every day!
    But there is more, I’m going to get married next year to my girlfriend who is back in England. Her last name is Masters. Is that a match made in heaven or is it hell? Love the the show.

  11. LukeSoul In Enfield Says:

    Everyone in my school calls my friend ryan ‘major bell’ because he posted it as his name on facebook. Only two people actaully know why he changed it to thats and everyone will call him it forever even though he changed his name to non major bell

  12. Sonny-D Says:

    I have the opposie probelem to most people – my name IS Sonny. The thing is most people think this is a nickname, and i’m still asked by people what my real name is! People are actually visibly amazed when they find out i’m Sonny D (for Drake, if you where wondering). So my ‘nickname’ is usually just my name…
    I’m also called ‘Sunday’ by some, which was an accidental miss-hearing of my name during Rugby practice.
    And of course there’s always the obligitory surname deviation, ‘Drakey’.

  13. Kelly Says:

    My mother calls me “Fish-Belly” because I have pale skin.

    One of my friends calls me “Yog,” I’m not sure why anymore.

    Another friend calls me “The Book of Kells,” which is at least related to my actual name (Kelly), but isn’t exactly short or easier.

    One of my professors here at university called me “Goat Girl” for a semester.

  14. Claire in Sevenoaks Says:

    One a upon a time, on our elderly school bus charlie, me and my friends Stephnish, Blob Jezums and I were texting each other. (None of us had these nick names at the time). Somthing to do with predictive text, i got sent a text saying “Logghi” (Log-ee) from Jezums. Stephnish then sent me one saying “hi logghi how are you, hi logghi hi ho!” That was over a year ago. To this day I am still known as Logghi

    Claire, 12
    in Sevenoaks

  15. Lindsay Says:

    My name is Lindsay, but in high school my friends decided to “shorten” it to Linda. From there, it somehow morphed into Linda Dang – I have no idea where this came from or why it stuck… ridiculous as it is, a lot of the people I met from grade 10 on thought that this was my name.

    Lindsay isn’t so hard to pronounce or remember, is it?

  16. Laura Says:

    A boy at my school was known as Minge and would even introduce himself as such to teachers.

  17. Lee Says:

    My ginger friend Steve revealed a while back that his mum affectionately called him ‘Copper Nob’ while he was growing up. She’s done all of his mates a favour as none of our nicknames for him can top this!

  18. Bede Says:

    My name is Bede, but my nickname is Peter. This is nothing on the brilliant Smeg. None of you three would understand what it is like to have a name that very few people have. It began when one of my bestfriends first met me, in year 7. He decided to call me Peter. Now this stuck. But not as a nickname, people I was incredibly close to thought that Peter was infact my real name, and Bede a nickname. Others thought Peter was my middle name, and others the name of my father. When it is none of these.!

  19. James Says:

    I went to the same school as my older brother and in his circle of friends everyone got called by their surname (or an abbreviation of it) until you acquired a nickname. When I joined the circle they were stumped as to what to call me and various names were tried but none of them stuck (I kept asking why they could not just call me James – but this was the equivalent to asking the Pope why he just doesn’t give scientology a crack). Eventually they stuck with Lazenby (my surname) Jr but quickly this got turned into Lazenbaby. This was not the manly nick name I wanted but it caught on, even outside the circle of friends. It became the name on the back of my rugby Jersey, teachers used to call me it, and one new teacher even thought it was my actual name and wrote it on my report card. to this day I’m 27, 6ft 4, 120kg with a beard and still get called Lazenbaby.

  20. Chris Says:

    Nicknames, nicknames, nicknames. I’ve had more than my fair share.
    I am generously proportioned in the teeth department. This isn’t such a bad thing in my adult form… but the same sized teeth in a 12 year old is just not going to be missed by other kids…

    So, through secondary school I was affectionately called “Walrus” and “Stonehenge” – nice. I thought I’d shaken them, but I was mortified to bump into an old school “friend” a couple of years back. I say “bump” into, in place of him shouting “Oiiiiii. Is thaaat you walrus?” across the street. His nickname was Mogsy though… twat.

    In college I was found to have a cheesy grin. This led to some people calling me “Cheesy”. This then followed me all the way through Uni and into adult life. I am known by more people as Cheesy nowadays than by my real name. Indeed, there are more than a few people that have no idea what my real name is.

    Mostly, I don’t mind this nickname. Walking into the pub and people greeting me with “hello Cheese” only garners a few odd looks. And so in general I’m happy to keep the name going but it’s pretty important that people are informed pretty soon that it’s because of my GRIN… not my feet, or indeed my nob.

  21. Ronan Says:

    I’m from Northern Ireland and went to an all Boys Catholic Grammar school so you’d expect a bit of intelligence, right?
    My nickname originated in one of my first classes of GCSE I.T. – four years ago!
    Because this was the year when all previous classes where chopped up and blended into Frankensteinesque form groups, and there only being 13 people in this particular class, nobody knew my name.
    Anyway, me being a helpful person and unashamedly good with handling computers I was quickly being asked for “How do ya do this?” and “What do I do now?” all the while nobody really knew my name – so they invented one.
    Apparently I look like a ‘Bob’.
    This spread like H1N1 throughout my school and even my friends started calling me it. The guy who coined the phrase had even forgotten he’d invented it and thought it was my real name!
    Worst of all, every friend I’ve made since then calls me Bob – most without knowing it isn’t my real name – and these are now my best friends.
    If you do read this out, please give a shout out to Conal who is an avid listener also – He too calls me Bob. Great Podcast! Keep up the superb work!

  22. SophieMadeOfStars Says:

    when i was younger my friend and i went through a phase of calling each other Katillious (Kate) and Sophillious (Sophie – me!). but my mate’s mum got confused and kept calling me syphilis for about a year 😦

  23. Sara Says:

    Please excuse my typos. 😦

  24. Sara Says:

    Let me prefice this by saying that I am, as far as I know, not Polish. My father, brother, and my brother’s weightlifting (as in Olympic lifting, NOT bodybuilding) coach call me “Polska”.
    The reason I don’t like this is because this nickname arose when my dad was watching a weightlifting world championship video. I don’t remember how old I was at the time, but I was quite little I started calling calling one of the Polish lifters “Blondie” because he had extremely light blonde hair. I too have blonde hair and my dad said I looked like I could be the lifter’s little sister.
    As I got older my dad decided that I have a big Slavic face and therefore look Polish. No that isn’t supposed to make sense.
    A few years ago my brother gave me Polska sweatshirt for Christmas. Whenever I wear it people start speaking Polish to me and I have to say “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m not actually Polish.” They then smile awkwardly and say “Oh” and walk away confused.

  25. Katharine Says:

    I have two family nicknames which show up the flawed thought-processes of my mother and brother. My mum, as a shortened form of my first name, calls me ‘Skat’, and it was quite a while before I realised this was also a style of freeform jazz, and ultra-degrading pornography. Somehow this nickname then got elongated to ‘Skatbog’, leaving my older brother to re-christen me ‘Bog’. He still refers to me as such in private and public. He is thirty one, I am twenty three. As nicknames go, ones that sound less like they involve bowel movements would have been nice.

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