plant murder revenge




We have blood (well, chlorophyll) on our hands, thanks to listener Davi:

For the past couple months I’ve been renting the spare room of an evil cunt-woman from hell.

I’m moving out soon, and I fantasize frequently about taking some sort of crushing, flamboyant revenge against her – however, she has a security deposit from me so I couldn’t do anything obvious or damaging that she could charge me for.

Instead, I took the advice of one of your previous shows about how to furtively commit plant murder, and I watered her beloved windowsill basil plant with salt water every time I was mad at her. Within a week it shriveled up and died.

She has no idea it was me and I feel good enough that I don’t think I’ll kill her before I move out in a couple weeks. Thanks for the great tip, and keep up the good work!

OK Davi, we will, until we are arrested as accessories to floricide.


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