cinematic snooze



AMT234 has spurred Martin to write in:

As you have stated on many occasions, you are yet to be blessed with the fruit of your loins; a point emphasized by the comment, “How do parents make it through kids’ films?”

As a father of three beautiful children I can assure you that the guff churned out by Pixar, Disney and Dreamworks is indeed proof of God’s existence.

The cinema means that kids are in a safe environment, they are being entertained by someone other than yourself in a moralizing and amusing fashion and have a trough of popcorn to stop their hands from punching each other.

Knowing this, I sit back and get the best sleep ever. At the end of each film I feel as though I have slept for a fortnight and can wake to find the kids still in one piece both physically and psychologically.

Recently I slept through The Avengers which, from what I can gather from my seven-year-old film critic, had explosions, crashes and fights all the way through. I missed them all. Nothing can keep me awake. Brilliant.

And are there films which work the opposite way round, ie keep the parent lively while sending the sprogs off to Snoozeford? Chip in, people, via the comments. If a DVD of Black Narcissus is all it takes to sedate my gaggle of niecephews, it’s far cheaper and safer than Ritalin.


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