•••THE ANSWER ME THIS! SPORTS DAY IS OUT NOW•••
This week’s obligatory wedding question is, for once, not a spin on “Why has the bride become such a cnut?” Instead, Katie from Christchurch, New Zealand asks:
I agreed a couple of years ago with my best childhood friend that we would marry each other if enough time passed and we both remained unattached. I would say we agreed on 40 as an appropriate age, but honestly I don’t remember if we even agreed an age.
That lack of certainty may make the whole thing not binding (I’m sure otherwise it would absolutely be enforceable in court), but my question is this, do you know anyone or have you ever heard of anyone actually following through with their backup? Do backup pacts serve any purpose other than reassurance when you’re lonely in your twenties?
My friend is a wonderful man and we have a deep history of love and loyalty, and I have no doubt he would make an excellent husband. Nevertheless I can’t imagine my fortieth birthday rolling around and suddenly deciding that the single life was up and it was time to settle down with him.
Good point Katie – is this something which ever happens outside of a Jennifer Aniston film? Readers, please go to the comments right now and let us know whether you are now happily/unhappily married to your backup.
Obviously this hasn’t happened to any of us, because all of our friends contemplated the prospect of marriage to us and realised that the single life is really not so bad after all.
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Tags: marriage, things that only happen in the movies, weddings
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Answer Me This! Podcast 
July 27, 2012 at 11:41 am |
Martin – for sure! If you’ve got the respect, trust and sense of kindness/decency, you’re right. That’s a big if though. But you’re right, a good and lasting marriage can arise in different circumstances. But have you ever heard a self-arranged marriage happening?
Rob – I vote yes. But do you think you’ll have to decide right then?
July 12, 2012 at 8:02 am |
Marrying for love may be overrated. Arranged marriages work surprisingly well, with significantly lower divorce rates than “love” marriages – and it’s not surprising. Both parties go in to the marriage with their eyes open and don’t expect some unrealistic fairy tale. I say if you think he’s a nice person, you might as well go ahead – that’s better than most people end up with!
July 12, 2012 at 7:50 am |
What timing! This issue has only just returned to the front of my mind. I made a similar pact with a uni friend (think the age agreed was 30 which we have both just passed). I am seeing her for the first time since the milestone when I chaperone her to a friends wedding in a few weeks. It is fairly likely that we shall share a bed, but should I also share my name?