long payoff

by

Time for a laugh/”I don’t get it. Oh! Ha” thanks to Tom in Glasgow:

When I was around eight years old, I overheard my mum telling her pal a quirky little joke that made them snigger a lot. The joke was:

Q: what do you do if an elephant comes through your window?
A: Swim.

I didn’t get the joke at all, but I always remembered it, and even told it to other people several times!

I am now in my thirties and actually have children of my own. I am ashamed to say that I have just reminisced in my brain about that puzzling day when I was eight and have just ‘GOT THE JOKE’ (hehehe snigger).

Answer me this: have you ever heard a joke and taken a long, or as in my case, a very fucking long time to get the punchline?

Oh, plenty! But luckily, in the podcast we can edit out the twenty-year pause.

Readers, please give us all a chuckle today by going to the comments and telling us a joke that we might not get for a couple of decades, or unless our mums explain it to us.

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12 Responses to “long payoff”

  1. Hannah Says:

    Q: Why did the baker have smelly fingers?
    A: Because he needed a poo.

    Took me a solid year to get that one.

  2. gaijintendo Says:

    I was told a really racist joke, by a kid, as a kid. I only now realise what a weird kid I was, as I knew how velcro worked, with burrs and loops. I explained that hair was not like that, no matter where you were from, and it wouldn’t stop you jumping on the bed.

    It is only now I realise how racist the 80s were though. I didn’t realise that at the time, when I was about 8 years old. It is a pretty insidious thing though. Eek.

    I also remember older boys telling me that you had to pee into a woman to make her pregnant. I remember knowing that was utter bullshit, but having not enough knowlege to correct them.

    Ha, and one time I was told in Sunday school to draw the smallest thing I could think of, and I touched the paper so lightly with a pencil, then drew an arrow saying there was an atom there.

    I can;t believe given how smart I was as a kid, what a fuckup I am as an adult.

  3. Jazz Says:

    Q. What’s red, sits in a tree, and hoots?
    A. A Sanitary Owl.

    I first heard this joke when I was 7 or 8, and couldn’t understand why a red owl would be considered a clean, hygienic owl. I had a moment of clarity at about the age of 21 when something happened that made me recall the joke, and then it hit me!

  4. Mark Ostryn Says:

    Black, white and red all over? Newspaper.
    Took me 40 years.
    Didn’t get it at all for the first 5 years.
    Assumed for the next 35 years that it was a political joke – red, being associated with socialism.
    Finally it clicked that red meant read.

  5. Jimbobbybob Says:

    Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

  6. rob camp Says:

    Can you name me three fish beginning and ending in the letter K?

    1. Killer shark
    2. Kwik Save frozen haddock
    3. Kilmarnock

  7. Jenny Says:

    Not being funny, but I don’t get it. Please explain! (In my defense I have been writing an assignment all day so my brain has officially stopped functioning.)

  8. Murray Parnell Says:

    Q. Why did the man put the can in the bin?
    A. Because of the grasshopper

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