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A fellow who dubs himself ‘Most certainly not a serial killer’ from Brooklyn, New York has a question that is PURELY THEORETICAL:
Answer me this: what is the ideal way for a serial killer to go about his/her work?
I’ve developed a system of sorts, but it is rather lengthy [as behoves something which is 100% PURELY THEORETICAL, ALRIGHT?].
1. The Location
Ideally an area that has high traffic during the day but virtually none at night and sans CCTV cameras, for example an alleyway or side street which many traverse, allowing for any evidence left at the scene to be contaminated with the residue of hundreds of others.
2. The Means
Anything that would leave residue at the scene is not viable, such as firearms; blades are acceptable as long as slashing is kept to a minimum, reducing blood loss of the victim. Ideally a fast acting poison, ricin or cyanide, leaving virtually no evidence of the actual means at the scene.
3. The Act
As quick as possible obviously, without alerting the victim so as to avoid shouts &c, have a means of travel (car) nearby but not too nearby and in a location where there are no CCTV cameras between the location of the car and the location of the murder.
4. Disposal
Multiple sacks of powdered concrete are needed for this step. First chop up limbs into segments that would fit in 25cm by 15 cm by 10cm blocks of concrete (standard cinderblock size, prepare concrete beforehand to expedite this step). The head can go whole in a block of its own not bigger than 30cm by 15cm by 15cm. The remaining torso shall go in a shallow slab, 60-70cm by 30-40cm by 20cm. These blocks, once set, can be disposed of inconspicuously at a derelict building site, or if one lives near a port, in a pile of ballast, which would allow the body to be disposed of rather efficiently as the body parts would be scattered across the world by boats, making it extremely unlikely that the body would ever be found.
It’s a very sensible method, I’ll give you that; but where’s the fun? If you pay heed to the modi operandi of some of the world’s most notorious serial killers, efficiency and/or a clean getaway weren’t necessarily trademarks.
Readers, perhaps you’d like to take this opportunity to regale everybody in the comments with your own ideal serial killer routine. Don’t be shy. I bet you’ve thought of one.
Answer Me This! Podcast 
October 17, 2011 at 7:26 pm |
For the record I’ve spent 4 weeks researching serial killers for a school project. This is my method ;
Location – Like Chris from Cardiff ( Australia ) I would pick a location
with minimal traffic at night , but regular commuters.
Victim – I would spend a few weeks sitting in a nearby coffee shop so I could watch possible victims and see their routine, as most people have one i.e get up, get ready for work, catch the early train so to have enough time to get a coffee, then walk the next 2 blocks to work. I would pick a tired looking person.
Murder – I would follow them down one of their usual short cuts then strike. Firstly I would trip them up so to catch them off guard.
Weapon – I would always use a different blunt object.
Disposal – I would leave them there for the cops to find.
I know it sounds kinda creepy but I would never actually do this to another human being
September 29, 2011 at 3:00 pm |
*Sunglasses face is supposed to be an 8 with closed parentheses. #damnyouemoticons
September 29, 2011 at 2:59 pm |
Haha unfortunately I took one of my teachers’ japes a little *too* seriously when he suggested this as a topic for an “instructive presentation to the class”. I presented this to a room of 30 peers, the teacher, and the student teacher on her first placement in an actual school) #funtimes
This is my method:
1) The victim is a total unknown to the killer, there is no connection between them apart from being in the same place at the same time.
2) The murder weapon is *always* sourced at the scene and left at the scene (e.g. a discarded brick near a building site, stones, lumps of wood, etc.; NEVER a traceable poison, and NEVER an implement the killer is trained to use)
3) The murder is always a crime of opportunity, not a planned attack
4) The killer wears clothes bought from an op-shop and gloves which can be burnt easily
5) The venue is, much like ‘most certainly not a serial killer’ suggested, a venue with minimal traffic at night
6) Disposal – both the body and the weapon are left at the scene
7) Intervals — the killer should not strike at regular intervals, each attack should be erratic almost as if not-connected to the attacks.
8) The escape route — the killer needs to have an escape route in case the police get too close. The escape route cannot be too suspicious or out of character — it must be subtle. The killer cannot take any more than an overnight bag with them and they must leave their most valuable possessions behind, taking only some clothes, a bit of cash (not too large an amount), and some general holiday-going things (cameras, etc.)
I have a distinct feeling I’ve forgotten something, but it can’t have been that important.
Either way, I doubt whether it would work at all!
September 29, 2011 at 1:33 pm |
Dexter already solved this problem for us! And he hasn’t been caught…yet