Meet The Zaltzwicks


So, Helen and Martin got married last weekend.

I’ve been waiting to blog about it because I was waiting for the right photos. These beauties were taken by Rick, Helen’s brother, and only emailed to me today. He was lugging around a camera the size of a labrador at the wedding, so I’d suspected they would be worth waiting for.


It was a really charming event, perhaps the loveliest wedding I’ve ever been to, and VERY Helen and Martin. They were super-relaxed – greeting guests as we arrived at the service, rather than making a grand entrance, and cracking jokes throughout – and the grub was a slap-up home-made afternoon tea, washed down with a LOT of pink champagne (they’re not drinkers). Oh, and a fish and chip van at 11pm. And a cheeseboard. Awesome.

The ceremony was al fresco, in a beautiful park in Kent (alongside a craft fair and fete – and even a meet-and-greet with celebrity porkchop PEPPA PIG!), but luckily the rain held back for the ceremony, despite hilarious and dramatic thunderclaps as the happy couple made their way down the aisle. Well, if you are going to have a resolutely secular wedding at Easter time, God will make His feelings known…

Back at the Zaltzman family pile, there were cracking tributes by various folks including friends-of-the-podcast Alex Thomas and Andy Zaltzman, but, it must be said, Helen and Martin’s dads pulled off the funniest speeches of the night.

Helen and Martin are now on honeymoon somewhere in the States, no doubt listening to discordantly intellectual audiobooks as they speed down the highway, stopping frequently to photograph funny road signs, or further snapshots of Martin sucking yet another ice lolly that looks a bit like a penis. They claim not to yet know what their new surname will be, but for me – as for all true AMT! fans – they will be Forever Zaltzwick.

Well done, chaps.

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26 Responses to “Meet The Zaltzwicks”

  1. Stacey Says:

    Congratulations to the Zaltzwicks!

    Is Helen wearing anchor earrings? It’s official. Helen, you are the woman I want to become!
    (Not literally. That would be creepy.)

  2. ohnonichole Says:

    Awww that’s awesome! You all look so beautifu! Helen, we need to see more of your dress! I’m not sure why we need to, but I’m a woman and need to see those things!

    Gratz to you guys and all and on the Sony Gold! You guys really deserve it!

  3. murrayNE Says:

    Yay Martin! Yay Helen! Yay Zaltzwicks!!!

    Yay Olly for the post!

    Definitely the celebrity wedding of the year, no contest.

  4. Holly Says:

    Congratulations Helen and Martin on your ‘celebrity wedding o’ the year’. 😉 Hope you have a long and happy marriage, I’m sure it will be full of love, fun and laughter.

  5. Vikki Says:

    Congrats, you look lovely together and looks like a wonderful day, wishing you a future together of happiness

  6. Olibob Says:

    Beautiful! You both look very happy and sexy in your outfits. And umbrellas ≡ epic. By the way Helen, has anyone ever told you that you look a lot like that crazy killer lady from Luther, but in a good way? Look at the top picture, then look in the mirror. Enjoy.

  7. Nina (West Sussex) Says:

    Congratulations to you both, the pictures look wonderful and it looks as though your day was the perfect antidote to all the Royal Wedding hype. I hope you will both have a long and happy life together.

    I can’t believe you got Peppa Pig at your wedding – how jealous am I?!

    Enjoy your honeymoon and come back soon so we can have some more brilliant podcasting genius from the team!

  8. Molly Says:

    Many congrats Mrs and Mr Zaltzwick! May you have a happy and full life together.

  9. Katie Says:

    Brilliant umbrellas, excellent in general, congrats en masse. Well done, and hopefully you don’t get shot or otherwise brutalized on your US honeymoon. Where all are the Zaltzwicks headed, anyway?! Surely some of their other American fans could reciprocate in an ‘Answer Me This, where is the worst place to get your rocks off in the US’ question bonanza, and I do so hope they’ve ventured past the east coast and midwest.

  10. hattie Says:

    congratulations guys, helen you look so beautiful!!! my sister and I have been so excited for you. good luck!

  11. Garry McNamara Says:

    …those are umbrellas? I thought it was Land of the Giants themed wedding and they were the bottle tops.

    I think what we all really want to know is did Martin promise to ‘obey’ or to ‘keep’ and did Olly catch the bouquet?

  12. royston westbury Says:

    nice one guys, just waiting for the 10page photos and interview in “hello” magazine now and the full colour supplement in next weeks “news of the world” and olly, wow dude your hitting above your average, nice one

  13. Suti from Auckland Says:

    Long time listener first time poster! I heard someone say this on the radio once thus I presume it is a fact that must be shared.

    Congratulations Helen and Martin! I wish you guys a long happy marriage.
    I assure you this is purely for selfish reasons as I would not want the Answer Me This! team to be broken up (or exist in a weird and creepy White-stripes-like friendship). Make it work kids.

    Also Olly’s girlfriend is much prettier than him. Virtual hi-five Olly.

  14. Michelle Says:

    Congrats guys! Sounds like a wonderful, personal occasion! You look lovely Helen! Well done, enjoy your honeymoon xo

  15. Darcy Says:

    Congrats guys, and thanks for the blog and pictures Olly!

    I loved the anchor earrings. Very appropriate for the occasion — just a bit more subtle than a ball and chain. 🙂

  16. Ann-Marie Says:

    Congrats Helen and Martin – the pics look fabulous and it sounds like a fantastic time was had by all…. I wonder if Peppa Pig can show up by chance at my wedding?!

  17. smash Says:


  18. Melinda Says:

    Congratulations Helen and Martin! It sounds like the best kind of wedding, and the photos are truly lovely. I hope you have lots of fun on your honeymoon!

  19. Helen Carrick Says:

    Hope that you had the best day and I’m looking forward to your full colour supplement and commerative mug on your return!

  20. David (from Maldon) Says:


  21. Siobhan Says:

    Aww, my heart is warmed and I consider myself to be a fairly cynical person. 😛

  22. Cats on Toast Radio Wired Show. Says:

    Aw it looks like a lovely wedding…and now I know what Martin the Soundman looks like!! All the best to the Zaltwicks. xxxxxxxxx

    P.S. you guys were a huge inspiration for my own radio show, thanks for much entertainment!

  23. Chris from Cardiff (Australia) Says:

    It looks like a really happy and joyous occasion! It genuinely made me smile reading this post.

    I wish the happy couple all the best for the future, with their winning combination they’re sure to be the married couple to beat all married couples!

  24. Goodyc2c Says:

    Congrats!! You guys are the best!

  25. REEEM!! Says:

    Helen looks lovely! They do make a very good couple, all the best and hope you have a good honeymoon 😀 p.s. Love the umbrellas!!

  26. Callum Leslie Says:

    Congrats to the happy couple – as someone who has worked in the wedding industry that has to be one of the most fun weddings I’ve ever known – who doesn’t want an umbrella with your name on??

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