Genetic lottery


** Click here for Episode 157 **

In last week’s episode we asked you to bemoan the goods your parents gave you, and duly you did bemoan:

Megan in North Walsham: My brother and I seem to have inherited opposite traits from our parents. My brother has inherited my Mum’s maths brain (she can barely count) and my Dad’s slim lovely ankles, whereas I have inherited my Dad’s better than average maths brain, and my mum’s horrible fat ankles. Just thought you’d like to know.

Lucy from Edinburgh: I wish I hadn’t inherited my Dad’s hatred of people or his singing voice.

Cara from Orkney: From my parents I inherited: left handedness, AB negative blood, osteoporosis (something to look forward to!), idiopathic scoliosis – although they reckon that it’s genetic – absolutely no arm muscles whatsoever, the ability to be good at most things but not quite good enough to be great, very small teeth, long, slim legs and crippling shyness.

Amber from Kansas: I inherited my father’s good looks. As you can see by my name, I’m a woman. I’m not saying I’m manly-looking. The giant rack I inherited from my mother helps.* Also my Dad is a baby-face and the roundness fits on a woman just as much as on a man. However, there are certain haircuts that I avoid like the plague, as I’ve had more than one relative mistake a picture of me with shorter hair for that of my father! One aunt in particular cheerfully asked where my grandmother found “all these old pictures of Oggie (my dad’s nickname).” It was a stack of pictures of me at various ages.

I would have preferred my Dad’s inability to procrastinate. Instead, I look like him as a boy. Excellent.

*Another bit of genes I wish hadn’t manifested themselves. Back pain and trying to shop for shirts that don’t a) make me look like a skank or b) make me look 30 lbs overweight are things I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

Elly from Somerset: What I got: mum’s shortness (I am the shortest in my family for generations, and my brother is 6’4″) and my dad’s under-eye circles and keratosis pilaris. Not fetching aesthetically. I really would’ve preferred my mum’s tits and ability to do well in exams with no revision, combined with my dad’s ability to tan.

Keep ’em coming, people.

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