Four weddings and another wedding


** Click here for Episode 125 **

Even though all three of us are spinsters (sob!), we enjoy you asking us about weddings. We were, however, very surprised when Xavier sent us one such question, seeing as he has more matrimonial experience than all of us combined. He asks:

I have been married 4 times already despite never ever asking anyone to marry me, and ending up with some really evil fuckers. I have finally met someone really special and am thinking of asking her to marry me,

I have previously been married in a church, a registry office, on a beach in a foreign country and at Gretna Green, my questions is this where do i get married now that would be different?

I see you haven’t done a Vegas wedding yet, but seeing as they all seem to have a fairly short time limit, we think it’s best avoided. We also note that you’ve done church, but not synagogue; perhaps it’s time to explore some other faiths, just to add cultural variety to your nuptual history.

Between us we’ve been to some very jolly weddings beneath a waterfall, on top of a hill, in museums and in a zoo; and we do enjoy those pictures in the tabloids when couples get married underwater with scuba gear, or jumping out of planes, or in the joinery aisle of B&Q. But as we don’t know whether the future Mrs Xavier V is aquatic/adrenaline-chasing/Handy Andy, we can’t give you a solid plan. But perhaps YOU can, readers? Head to the comments and tell Xavier where to have his fifth wedding! The person with the best suggestion gets to be a bridesmaid.

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3 Responses to “Four weddings and another wedding”


    In a gay bar toilet cubicle. That way if you suddenly need time to think you can nip out for a fag.

  2. Sarah FitzGerald Says:

    Given his history with marriage perhaps it is time to consider not doing it again. If things are working as they are then why not confirm to everyone how much they love each other by throwing a massive party, and perhaps making some sort of vow to one another, but avoid the actual legal contract. That way maybe he can avoid whatever it is about marriage which doesn’t work for him whilst holding on to the fun bits.

  3. Tsam Says:

    How about a court. That way, if you decide it was a mistake right after the vows, you can have the whole thing annulled without having to leave the building, and the same judge that joined you together can rip you apart again.

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