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Last Saturday’s Eurovision Song Contest has left you with many questions (aside from WHY DIDN’T GREECE WIN?). For instance, this one from Orpon:
This year the Eurovision Song Contest was held in Malmö, Sweden. This happens to be my hometown and I barely made it out of this frenzy alive.
For several weeks every year nothing else matters but the ESC and since it was held in Sweden this year it was much, much worse. Even if our prime minister should be murdered (again) I don’t think it would make the news if it happened during the ESC craze.
Answer me this: when so many European nations succumb to the ESC madness, why don’t the British care at all about it? Are you too good to hang out with the rest of us? Don’t you like feather boas, confetti and crappy music?
Oh, we Brits do like those things – but only through a veil of sneering irony. And it’s inaccurate to say that we don’t care at all – we care very much that the Britain scores as close to nul points as possible.
On to a question from one of the scornful Brits, Paul from Northampton:
I’m watching Eurovision and all the awful acts that are desperately trying to win with this awful Europop. So answer me this: if Britain wants to win so badly, why haven’t they enter One Direction, as everyone seems to love them for some reason?
I take issue with Paul’s assertion that Britain wants to win so badly; see my statement above, along with every British entry since Katrina and the Waves – Daz Sampson? Scooch? Bin Man Andy? Jemini??? These are NOT the entries of a country with victory in the crosshairs.
Plus, I think One Direction are a bit too busy at the moment. But previous experience indicates that in ten years or so, they’ll probably need the gig.
Finally, a question about the scoring system from Rikki from Dunfermline:
Why is there no number 9 or 11 in the Eurovision Song Contest?
Those numbers have been banished from the Eurovisional points allocation since 1975. They got rid of them because Björn Ulvaeus said they were the least poppy numbers under 100. Or maybe there’s a solid mathematical reason, such as it helps avoid tied votes, or something.
Readers, do you have any idea? Go to the comments and inform us all. I lost a large part of my brain during this year’s contest, and it was the part that made me willing to google this sort of shit.
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