while you were sleeping



We thought ‘John from Wrexham‘ from AMT263 would have supplied us with the most dysfunctional personal problem of the year, but Anonymous is providing strong, strong competition. The tale is long, but stay attentive, because it does NOT go where you think it’s going to go from the set-up. Serious warning: contains potential trigger subjects. Approach with caution.

OK, here Anonymous goes:

I share a large house with some friends. We’re a friendly bunch and our abode has always been where parties seem to spontaneously happen. Friends, friends of friends, girlfriends, boyfriends, colleagues, neighbours… At least once a week there seems to be an impromptu gathering and a good time is had by all. It’s been this way for about six years.

About two years ago someone noticed that certain items were disappearing – the odd CD or occasional book – and this put a bit of a downer on things. We had our suspicions who the culprit was but couldn’t prove anything so those of us who lived in the house decided to move our personal belongings to our respective bedrooms.

After a hard evening’s imbibing of intoxicants I have a bit of a reputation to become more than a little comatose, but usually make it to bed. Because of this I decided to add a little more protection for my stuff by setting up a motion sensor security camera via my laptop and webcam – just in case the pilferer decided to take advantage of my deep sleep and the fact that my girlfriend was a nurse who sometimes worked night shifts and wasn’t always staying over.

Our precautions worked and the stealing seemed to stop but the partying continued – all was well in the world.

I’ve recently bought a house with my girlfriend of 8 years and we plan to get married next year, so I’ve been packing up all my belongings but couldn’t find a particular couple of CDs. I immediately thought that our thieving acquaintance must have had away with them and remembered my security set up and decided to see if anything had recorded from 2 years ago.

In I stumble and manage to get undressed before staggering naked to the bathroom before returning, turning the light out and collapsing onto the bed.

The lack of motion stops the recording, before starting again 40 minutes later when the door to my room opens and a figure slips quietly in and closes the door behind them.

A tabletop light is switched on – the figure is female and certainly not the person who we suspected of stealing. She sits on the bed and starts loudly whispering my name as though trying to wake me up. This goes on for a couple of minutes before she starts shaking me violently and eventually slapping my face. As I mentioned earlier, once I’m in a particularly inebriated state there is absolutely no way of waking me so this person is wasting their time.

The female stands and I notice that it is my girlfriend’s best and oldest friend, Alice.

What happened next was completely unexpected.

She strips down to her underwear before getting into my bed.

All is quiet for a few minutes before she throws back the covers and straddles me then moves down, removes my boxers and proceeds to orally bring some life into my drunken member.

From here on in it gets a little graphic.

The blow job coupled with some frantic wanking somehow manages to get me to attention, at which point she removes her underwear, straddles me again and starts to move up and down (I can’t see if penetration takes place). She then moves up so she’s kneeling over me and appears to bring herself to orgasm before going back down on me for another 5 minutes or so.

She seems to fall asleep with her head in my groin for about 2 minutes, stands up, gets dressed, tucks me in and leaves the room.

I checked the rest of the recordings and this happens SEVEN TIMES over an 8-month period.

She seems to get more and more confident as time goes on as she starts to talk dirty, sit on my face, from what she’s saying tries to do anal and the final time indulges in a bit of water-sports – which I’d always thought was me being so drunk I’d pissed the bed.

Don’t get me wrong, Alice is a fox with a body most women would pay money for and if I was a single man I wish I’d been concious, but answer me this…

WT actual F!

She is my future wife’s oldest friend and has already agreed to be a bridesmaid at our wedding.

Do I delete it and forget about it?
Tell her I know and risk it getting messy?
Tell my wife and risk it getting even more messy?
Forget about it and keep hold of the videos for wanking material?
Is she crazy?
Alice is travelling for another few months but how do I look her in the face when she gets back?

You’re worried about it getting messy? It already IS messy. LOOK AT THE FACTS:

You have VIDEO EVIDENCE of your wife-to-be’s best friend REPEATEDLY RAPING YOU. Yes, that is what she is doing. Even if you don’t feel traumatised by her actions, even if you don’t feel like a victim, this woman has proven herself to be a danger unto others. Forget the fact that she’s hot so under other circumstances etc etc etc: this is a crime, and you know what you have do about it. If it had been footage of your best friend sexually assaulting your wife as she slept, I doubt you’d hesitate to act.

You have to tell your wife, because keeping such a poisonous secret from her is going to be very difficult practically, what with the perpetrator being a major presence in your lives. Plus, I think your wife deserves to know that her supposed best friend has violated the tenets of friendship in truly mind-boggling fashion. Furthermore, you and your wife should both go for STI tests, because you can’t trust your sleep-rapist to have used barrier protection.

Sorry to drop the usual lighthearted AMT treatment of questions, but COME ON.

PS My friend who is an expert in these matters recommends that male victims of sexual crimes contact Survivors UK.


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14 Responses to “while you were sleeping”

  1. Ash Says:

    Holy flipping fricking hell.
    Yeah, uh, she needs to be arrested. Tell your girlfriend, and then tell the police. And for the love of Mike DON’T KEEP THIS SECRET. It will explode and bite you. Plus, if she’s done this to you, she may have done it to others, and that absolutely needs to be found out AND STOPPED if so. Especially if there is *any* chance she was drugging you in order to keep you unconscious and these encounters secret. This is a crime and really needs to be reported.

    Though man, your fiancee has all my sympathy. That’s one of the worst case of backstabbing by a friend I’ve ever heard.

  2. Murray Says:

    My thoughts, if they mean anything: You need to tell your fiancée. This can’t come out later, especially not with Alice setting the scene. And from this moment on, you’ve made a decision not to tell her if you keep it a secret.

    I understand that as a man it can feel like consent is not a “male type of issue” (in that stereotypes are that men saying no to sex Is unlikely), or that men “don’t look a gift horse in the mouth” sexually, but I agree with people that going to the police is completely appropriate. You could not give consent, and she had no right to assume it under those circumstances.

  3. Chris Says:

    Roofies much anyone?
    I recommend having her around for a movie night and then chucking the tape on.
    A. She can’t deny anything and is gone
    B. You are obviously looking shiny new in all this i.e the poor victim
    C. Remote possibility of a threesome..leave out the watersports tho.
    D. Redtube

  4. idlethoughtsfromanidlefellow Says:

    Also yes, definitely go to the police. This woman deserves jail time.

    Just reverse the genders and ask if you’d go to the police.

  5. idlethoughtsfromanidlefellow Says:

    Holly: Yes it isn’t technically rape but I looked it up a while ago and there is a law introduced in the 2004 sexual offences act that basically is for this thing with the exact same severity and possible sentencing as rape (which is as you describe it) and specifically made for this sort of thing. It’s not the slightly lower classification of sexual assault). Forget the specific name off hand but google it.

    Also in common parlance if not legal parlance it was rape. It’s not the only crime which is legally known by a different term to common use. Assault being a prime example.

    • Holly Says:

      Yes, it’s definitely rape in common parlance. The point I was making was that this sort of case demonstrates that legal parlance doesn’t fit with common parlance (and how ridiculous that is). Sorry if I wasn’t clear. I think the offence you’re thinking of is ‘causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent’, which was introduced in the Sexual Offences Act 2003. It does have the same maximum sentence (a life sentence), but it doesn’t have the same label – and fair labelling is important. The label of ‘rapist’ rightly carries with it a significant amount of negative baggage, whereas being guilty of ‘causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent’ doesn’t quite sum up the seriousness of the crime.

    • Holly Says:

      Also, although the maximum sentence is the same for both offences, the sentencing guidelines tell a slightly different story – the starting point for repeated rape of the same victim is 15 years, whereas the starting point for causing a person to engage in sexual activity without consent where penetration was involved and the victim was over 16 is 8 years. John’s email doesn’t disclose all of the facts that could be either aggravating or mitigating factors, so it’s impossible to say what a sentence would be (if it was prosecuted – sexual offences this serious almost always are prosecuted, especially when the evidence is so strong).

  6. Nickstar Says:

    But who stole the CDs?!!! 🙂

  7. Lee Says:

    If she’s as fit as this guy says he is, he wants to be blackmailing her into letting him smash her whilst conscious.

  8. Holly Says:

    Sorry to be pedantic, but this isn’t actually rape.

    It is, however, just the sort of case that demonstrates why it’s completely ridiculous that, under English law, women cannot be guilty of rape (except as an accessory). Rape requires the offender to penetrate the victim’s vagina or anus with his penis.

    It is sexual assault, however. It’s very, very clearly sexual assault.

    I would tell your girlfriend and then tell the police.

  9. mrsveg Says:

    That’s one of the most disturbing things I’ve ever read. If she’s done it to him she might have done it to someone else too, or could in the future. You have to go to the police.

  10. Rachie Lou Freebush (@RachelvsPublic) Says:

    You absolutely have to go to the police. What an evil woman.

  11. salt Says:

    Take your evidence to the police.

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